The Path of Suffering

The path of suffering:

of suffering-  and there are many promises to escape, offering a bypass through this certainty of life. Many paths have this as their stated goal, some more immediate, and others in a life to come, or a well earned realm free of earthy cares. But this is about the path of suffering. It's the only truth I'm able to write about with any real conviction. 

life is the path of suffering. 

not always, and sometimes not even often - there have been long stretches of peace, contentment, and happiness in my life. I've been blessed. Yet throughout suffering was always near, for me a presence of bleak depression that asked to be drowned out by drugs and alcohol, and too often I gave into this request. Twenty years of sobriety later and the voice has grown softer, asking for less, no real expectation of receiving. But still persistent. And the depression remains, perhaps less intense, an easier visit now and then. But still present. 

of course too there is always the tragic events of life and I won't offer my list of here - they are similar to yours, everyone's. They are an inescapable aspect of life. They cause suffering through loss, pain, and drastic changes. They're unexpected, crashing existence without notice. Even a life blessed will know these events all too well. It's just how life happens. 

so the promise, as it seems, is not about escaping pain, but to no longer suffer - that suffering is a separate cause from what hurts and can be avoided through some offered path. It's a well traveled path, and one I've walked for long. And still I suffer. But life has brought me to a new path and it leads only to what's present. Sometimes it leads to suffering. There is no sense in choosing another path, a different way that only leads me exactly here, again, and still find the same suffering I wished to leave behind. The path is suffering. 

it's not chosen.

it's also not bleak, life isn't a dark path that always leads to pain - it's varied, full, and seamless in way that reveals how suffering belongs. It's an aspect of life without bias. Suffering is the path because of what it offers, because it truly won't be avoided, and it is simply the only path that's found. I walk this path with you, together, and through this we provide a common light to guide our way. It's not a lonely path, it's ours. 

it's life. 

~

Love, Eric