A Promise of Grace

 

But there's a promise of grace:

nothing certain is promised, not that I have found, and this seems to be the underlying energy to seek a religion of permanence, to shore up the foundation of uncertainty that life is based upon. It's a false hope. But there is a promise of grace, and I choose this word purposely over peace, for even deep peace is a condition to be disturbed, having an opposite in a sense of chaos. Grace is the acceptance of all, each condition given the time of it's appearance, unconditional in its hold. It's a true foundation.

This isn't something to be earned or even freely given. It simply is. Life is the grace of motion, seamless and swift through constant change. It's only when I sit still for a bit, quiet, patient and without demand to see things a certain way, that I witness how subtle the world changes each moment, so often missed in my daily routine. Here, I even witness my own sense of peace disturbed in its calm, a slight sound of passing cars gives cause to my attention. There is a quick return to peaceful listening, almost instant after years of practiced sitting. Grace is that return. 

It's that life will always bring something that doesn't seem to belong, at least right now, not in this one moment where my deepest wish is calm. It's easy be peaceful when my faith is certain. But that's not life, it's the illusion of control, a hope to overcome the circumstance of present moments. Life is this, right now, and whatever's found. Grace is this acceptance. 

This isn't a practice, and there's no effort given - it's also not calmly abiding within life's storms. It's simply being alive, knowing that storms belong in their own way and time and that my participation, in someway at least, is required in life's action. I am part of the dynamics of it all. No matter what happens, whatever life delivers next, it always belongs and so does my reaction. I'm never certain of what that may be - yet there is always grace, no matter what's found. 

~

Peace, Eric