Answer to My Every Prayer

Answer to my every prayer: 

recently, and surprisingly,I find myself doing something I haven't done since I was a child - I'm praying in a very sincere and straight forward manner, asking for guidance and change in the way I presently view the world. This is a prayer of humbleness, stating that I don't the answers, any, not on anything of truly great importance, and that I now wish to surrender my best thoughts and opinions for a far greater intelligence than my own. 

I'm praying for a miracle to occur.

a miracle here is a mind shift, that there is, indeed, another way to see the world, a different view point that I keep missing in an insistence to have my demands met. The miracle is asking that I humble myself to silence, listening, and allowing the quiet voice of love to speak. Finally. I've hushed this voice for quite sometime, believing so much in my own opinion, giving ego sway to all my concerns. My prayers are always answered, immediately so -

and the answer itself is silence. 

of course it's not what my ego wishes to hear.

but if I'm patient,

sitting through silence just a bit longer than the ego's willing, a miracle occurs. I'm gifted with my own surrender, a sigh that comes through relief and relinquishment of my insistence. Presence is revealed, divine, that great intelligence that guides my blood to flow through every vein, directs heart to pump and my lungs to draw air. 

the miracle is that I find true holiness within.

I hear the only voice of God.

silence. 

always speaking love.

and the answer to my every prayer.

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Infinitely More Joyful

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Infinitely More Joyful

Infinitely more joyful; 

things will still happen, good and bad, and life continues to present itself through both joy and sorrow. Yet it seems different now, a subtle shift has occurred, and I'm finding myself far more relaxed to these daily challenges. In yoga, karma is seen as simply the consequence to infinite effects, life is motion, and there's no punishment here, just results naturally unfolding. A better, more fulfilled life, is brought about by addressing the cause to these events, not chasing down each effect for correction, but going straight to the source, being mindful of our thoughts and actions. 

more so, and how it seems to me right now..

is that I'm asked to be kind.

to forgive. 

this isn't an escape from karma, it's not bypassing any event or situation by forcing myself to see them through a new light. It's just seeing the truth that things are unfolding in the only way they're able to right now, and that my best response is to accept, forgive, and extend myself as love. From here, everything changes on its own, as it always does of course, yet I am less involved in any forceful way, there's less of an attempt to bend the world to fit my own particular demands.

I'm more relaxed.

kinder.

and forgiving.

the true cause, is always fear, it's projected outward to the world and that's the life we're given. Or it is until we see things clearly. We can transcend karma through forgiveness. It's that simple, and actually, it becomes joyful, life being filled with opportunities to offer only love. That's the value of forgiveness, a return to the innocence of the present moment where we're completely free of karma. Our salvation is truly at hand, right now, through whatever situation that's unfolding. 

yes, things will still happen.

they always will.

yet everything is different now...

we're able to forgive.

and life in infinitely more joyful. 

~

Peace, Eric,

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: A Great Discovery

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A Great Discovery

A great discovery: 

my one great discovery is this - that there's a way of seeing everything as having a purpose to serve me well and bring me to the realization that only love is real. Every relationship has this potential, my misfortunes too, nothing is excluded from this awakening. This doesn't bypass pain, it's not denying any suffering involved. No, this is more of an alchemical process of embracing all that's offered and simply forgiving the moment entirely, not seeking to transcend, but allowing it to be transformed through clear acceptance. 

it's nothing less than a miracles.

and all that's required is to ask for one.

a miracle here is to request a different mindset, surrendering my position as hostage to ego and allowing myself to be host to unconditional love. It certainly sounds like a tall order, almost impossible sometimes. Yet life will consistently give me practice, moments where I can correct my mis-perception through the process of forgiveness. A Course in Miracles provides a simple process - if there is pain, discomfort of any degree, then fear is present and the only remedy is love. 

that's the entirety of forgiveness...

replacing the illusion of fear,

with the reality of love. 

indeed, 

a great discovery,

 and now I have a lifetime to practice. 

~

Peace, Eric

To read more from Headless Now, please visit to read: An Easy Path

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An Easy Path

an easy path:

it's an easy path for me now, mindful without real effort, and the only real focus is on checking in with my emotions, a quick scan of thoughts when I find myself experiencing fear in any of its myriad forms. From this point on, it's just about forgiveness.

that's all. 

of course it took awhile to get here.

there's a line in A Course in Miracles that struck me deeply, chapter 11, where we're asked if we'd rather be host to God or hostage to ego. As I've spent a lifetime being held hostage to my ego's demands of resentment, judgement, and grievances - it seemed the right moment to try another plan, something kinder to myself and others. It was as simple as that, really, and although I had probably read that line a hundred times or more, for whatever reason now, 

I was ready.

chapter 6 of the Course offers another take on this, that in any moment we are either choosing crucifixion or resurrection, fear or love, grievance or forgiveness -  and this might be the entirety of our freewill, the only choice truly have. But first we need to able to see this, to know that peace is indeed an option, or more aptly, available as a present reality. 

and then...it's just a simple matter of choosing.

as often as needed.

an easy path,

with a lifetime of practice. 

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: A Path of Miracles

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A Path of Miracles

A Path of Miracles: 

over 30 years working with A Course in Miracles and it suddenly feels brand new to be, alive, and full of meaning, as if those previous decades were just preparation for bringing me to this very moment. It's not so much that I understand things in a deeper fashion, but that I am finally ready to let go of all the concepts and simply live my life in full surrender to forgiveness. 

it's always been my path. 

and now I truly know. 

finally. 

I think it's because I'm on somewhat of an edge right now, there's a present fear in life that's keener than ever before. I'm treading a line of loss and sorrow on one side and the complete unknown on the other. Yet somehow, beyond my understanding, there's a feeling that I'm being held, aided in my balance, and that if I should fall, well then, a gift of flight would be provided. 

this isn't a false confidence that I cannot fail, nor a belief that I'm on some gilded path of miracles. It's just a deep faith in life itself, that everything is always alright and that I only need to surrender my fearful thoughts as they continuously appear, forgiving my missteps along the way.

perhaps, then, it is a path of miracles. 

indeed.

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: A Single Line

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A Single Line

A Single Line: 

sometimes I'm struck by a single line or statement, a succinct teaching that sums up years of study and self-reflection to the point that I need go no further in my practice. These are just the right pointers that bring me to a deep understanding, intuitively knowing that I've stumbled upon an all important truth. There's such a line in Lesson 8 from A Course in Miracles, and I'm sure I've read it many times before through decades worth of reviews - but in this particular moment, for whatever reasons, it resonated as it never had before, delivering me to a profound silence, a pause of my every thought: 

from Lesson 8

the one truly whole thought that one can have about the past is that it's not here.

that was it, and it was enough to briefly stop my world, causing everything, past and future, to disappear for what can only be called a holy instant. All that remained was the present, just a moment untouched by any sense of time. Of course thoughts soon returned to analyze the whole affair, adding terms to clarify it as an experience, marveling at the after effects that still lingered. 

it seems I'd stumbled upon a knowing of a truth.

this actually happens quite often, especially with contemplative reading, slowing allowing just the right words to reach me, not so much a study as absorbing an ancient wisdom that was simply waiting s here for me all along. The rest of Lesson 8 is equally profound, with the following line bringing the point clearly home - that to thing about the past at all is therefore to thing upon an illusion. This is why I continuously study the Course, it's not to learn, but to remember the things I already know yet have somehow slightly forgotten, brushed aside through the ego's wish to know more than what this teaching offers.

sometimes though, with just a single line...

it's all that needed for my return. 

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Happy Learner

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Happy Learner

Happy Learner: 

these past few election cycles have taught me the impossibility of any attack thoughts residing within a peaceful mind. Above all, I want peace. This, of course, doesn't mean ignoring conditions of the world and refusing to take an active role in making it a better place for all to live. Yet it also doesn't call for my involvement in any of the turmoil, confusion, or attack on others that is so currently prevalent within our political system. What's called for, at least for me, is a recognition that things are this way because these thoughts are present within my mind.

my thoughts project the world I perceive. 

and so I am called to heal.

but only my own mind.

this is also true on a smaller level, not just politics, my own life is filled with moments that offer an opportunity to heal. This is continuous forgiveness, no chance encounters, every person and situation provides me a moment to heal, extend love, and examine my projections. If I perceive attack in any way then I know that my ego was overly involved. This then, becomes just another healing moment, a holy instant where I forgive myself in the gentlest fashion without remorse nor reprimand. 

another opportunity to heal. 

and these moments are endless. 

so these days of politics and social media are intense lessons of forgiveness for me, graduate school for a slow learner such as myself. It's also joyful. I find myself now, mostly so, a happy learner, developing a keen sense of surrender, and allowing myself to be guided through each lesson that arrives. I'm not alone in this, there's a greater intelligence involved and I'm more than willing to turn my thoughts over to this guide. My own thoughts, ego, certainly haven't brought me very far.

so with this, at this point, 

I find myself content,

joyful even...

..to simply be a happy learner. 

~

Peace, Eric

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Stories

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Stories

Stories: 

each morning I'm greeted by a blank screen that promises to hold whatever words that might arrive to me, nothing lingers from the past day's writing, it's a fresh gift of pure potentiality. So too is the nature of forgiveness, it erases those lingering effects of every past day, allowing me to begin my day with new inspiration to give to the page. 

we are stories that we tell to each other.

and forgiveness is the gift for a better story to be told.

or better still,

to simply love ourselves, 

and others,

free of any story.

simply as we are right now.

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Does God Have a Hero?

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Does God Have a Hero?

Does God Have a Hero? 

over 25 years ago I wrote a little handbook for myself. I titled the book Does God Have a Hero? and it was meant to be a guide for the upcoming years of sobriety, a decade of heavy drinking fresh behind me, and I was ready for some guidance greater than my own. For me, the title signified a life of service and forgiveness, after sitting in meditation one morning, feeling lost and unsure of direction - I asked God for my path to be revealed and the answer received was an intuitive poem.

does god have a hero?

soon after a series of essays followed, one for each stanza, and indeed, it felt like a guidebook for me, a clear direction with my new gift of sobriety. My talk of God and guidance shouldn't be confused with any religious views or sense, this wasn't channeled material from a higher realm or spirit-guide. It was just compassionate common sense from a part of me that had been long blocked off through fearful living. It was, and still is, the voice of God through my own best understanding. 

it was heart speaking directly to me.

and I was finally ready to listen.

in a sales sense, the book didn't do so well, published through one of the first print on demand houses, and with no funds for promotion, only a few people have ever read it. Yet it's my book, inspired, and it's message has been well lived by me. Not always successfully so, but the effort was always there to live by the loving guidelines provided. 

so does God have a hero?

I don't know. 

but I live my life as if it's so, 

compassionately, with deep care for others, practicing forgiveness. 

and that's enough for me,

even after 25 years.

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Imagine

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Imagine

Imagine: 

imagine what we would look like in the absence of description, no mirrors to reflect an image, without photos to offer us any proof of how others say we are. There would be nothing to compare us to and no contrast to be shown. Imagine, just for a moment, that we existed just as we are, complete and perfect in the eyes of God, our self-value unable to be measured by the standards of others - 

how then would we truly appear?

we would be beautiful...

and indeed, 

we are.

don't let the world convince you otherwise.

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: A Quiet Place

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A Quiet Place

A quiet place: 

my goals have been simplified, down to one really -  just a wish to be a quiet place of receiving whatever comes to me, with grievances no longer being held, and everything instantly forgiven in the very moment of their witness, 

to be a quiet place where only love is found. 

it's with this that I believe my every need is met, that I live by the hand of grace and display a truly grateful heart for everything received. A tall order indeed, maybe even seen as ambitious in a way. Except that all of this already in order, being what I am in my most basic sense of being. Only my thoughts keep from this realization, believing myself separate from my original source, lacking in some specific and yet still undermined way. My life now is one of emptying myself of all falsity, letting go of blinders that keep me bound to these previous state of affairs. 

 it seems like I'm preparing myself for something unknown,

something mysterious,

and yet somehow...intimately familiar as well. 

as if I'm returning home. 

finally. 

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Resign

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I resign

I resign: 

it's at this point that I resign, admitting that I don't know my own best interest and turning everything over to a greater intelligence than my own. Up until now it feels as if my every decision has been wrong, determined by a demand for a sort of happiness that is at best fleeting and more aptly seen as completely misguided. My goal has been to always please the ego, an illusory affair of wants and demands, petty grievances and long held resentments. 

something deeper within, 

a greater intelligence,

tells me I'm better than that...

and now, finally...

I'm listening.

and this is my trues voice that I now turn to, being the very same intelligence that has guided constellations into arrangement, influences both moon and tide, and stirred a whispered word of expansion into the Big Bang of our existence. I place my trust here, willing to listen, and more so, to resign from my every previous belief that keeps me trapped within illusion. 

I give up,

surrendering myself to this...

an intelligence far greater than my own.

I give myself to love.

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit; When Owls Call

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When Owls Call

When owls call: 

it's almost 4:00 and just a slight distance from my office window there's a barred owl sounding it's wild September call, only briefest silence, a reply is offered, a conversation now that stirs me deeply, urging me to leave my desk and sit beneath their nesting tree. This was not my planned writing, I had an entirely different topic in mind - but last year I made a promise to the neighborhood owls, that I would follow their voice to the best I'm able, responding to my own wild urge that thrills to their call.

and that's what I'm doing now, letting go of my own planned writing and offering a response with morning words, willingly resigning my original thoughts in order to keep my promise to the owls. This is a spirit call for me, an opportunity to embrace the spontaneous wilderness of my own nature, no longer subdued by previous commitments. 

when owls call...

in whatever way I'm able,

I respond. 

so with writing finished for the morning,

I step outside,

as the owls are still calling.

~

Peace, Eric

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Ultimate Cause

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Ultimate Cause

Ultimate cause:

karma, Sanskrit word meaning action, is almost always misunderstood as punishment for wrongful deeds or a reward for our good behavior. Of course action itself is impartial, there's no judgement here, and we're simply living within the results of infinite choices made. With this in mind, there's really no escape from karma, we're literally choice making machines, results following our every single cause. 

so it might seem hopeless. 

we're doomed to the effects of our choices.

except in light of our ultimate cause...

and that's only ever seen through the lens of love.

 in the Bhagavad Gita Krishna counsels Arjuna on the transformation of karma, telling him that it can't be escaped but there's a promise of transcending it through the process of surrendering our every action to the Lord. Here we can see that the term Lord means our ultimate cause and that everything that follows forth is an effect of God. 

that's our surrender.

God.

Love.

again, the ultimate cause of all.

A Course in Miracles urges us to not concern ourselves with the world of effects and to turn within and see that we've completely lost sight of the ultimate cause. We've made a god of fear and have given it all of our belief and faith, projecting it outwards as a false idol for our worship. 

but it's an illusion.

if the ultimate cause is love, that is what we must turn to, it's our surrender, and we forgive our way back to it's solution. That's when we see the light, our own, the source of every true effect. This when we turn away from illusions and it's projections, we've escaped the sin of karma and now see every action as a cause for extension. 

we surrender fully to the effects of love.

for that is solely what we truly are.

and all we have to give away.

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Everything We Need 

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Everything We Need

Everything we need: 

So the questions are - how much of our resentment is justified? Are our grievances measured by the amount of hurt we hold right now? Or from the satisfaction we seem to gain from the suffering of another who might have harmed us long before? 

our ego will cling to one answer.

yet our heart always offers something more...

forgiveness gives us everything we need.

the ego will always say that grievances matter, having us believe that they're a protective armor keeping us safe within a harden wall of pain. It's the very identity of the ego to harbor these beliefs, justifying it's existence through the protection it claims to offer. But forgiveness cracks us open, shattering the illusion that we're separate from others. Real forgiveness is not measured by time nor distance, it's inseparable from our original innocence, an event of quantum nature, entangled hearts of our true existence shining through. We suddenly find ourselves beyond the need of any fortification, unable to be contained by the previous walls of ego. 

forgiveness shatters our every wall.

and only love remains.

spacious.

all embracing.

giving us all we truly need.

`

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Ego's Play

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Ego's Play

Ego's play: 

it seems the ego's plan is to always keep grievances alive, flourishing really, and with this there comes a sureness to its identity, that only by retaliation will our safety be found. Yet forgiveness derails this plan, surrendering grievances makes the ego obsolete and with this...

true freedom is found. 

we experience ourselves as only love.

of course it's a work in progress, and I find this true more than ever right now. At this point in my life my deep wish is to beyond grievances, my own, and being involved in others. Life doesn't work that way though, as long as the ego's in play there will always be vital work at hand. I could easily bemoan the fact that this is so, that after years, half a lifetime really, I am still enmeshed in ego's play of grievance. But that would miss the opportunity entirely - 

I am exactly where I need to be.

for whatever reason that it's so.

and as always...

my only role is to let go.

forgiving every grievance that is found.

~

Peace, Eric

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: All the Way Down

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All the Way Down

All the way down: 

changed through forgiveness, a continuous practice but only because I'm still so drawn into my own petty concerns, grievances and resentments are now more clever in their appearance, and I often find myself caught in a subtle grip of self importance. Yet even with all this my joy has grown deeper and my smile more genuine than ever, I'm more relaxed, and forgiveness comes quick and unbidden to my mind. Mostly though...it's no longer really a practice.

at some point, and I don't know when exactly - I was changed through forgiveness, transformed really. By this I mean that it became no longer an option, it wasn't something that I did but now a deep reflection of what I truly am through all hours of the day. Of course, as mentioned above, there's still an awful lot of forgetting, quite often really, yet there's no punishment here, not even a resolve to do better. 

there's just forgiveness...

all the way down. 

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Morning Prayer

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Morning Prayer

Morning prayer: 

there's a morning prayer offered in A Course in Miracles that I dearly love - it takes the challenges of the day ahead and surrenders them to God, asking these questions:

"where would you have me go? What would you have me do? What would you have me say, and to whom? "

and with that, my role is over, I simply go where I'm directed, doing whatever is called for me to do, and speaking just the right words to those whom I meet along the way. What I most love about this prayer is that it could easily have been found in the Tao Te Ching, or the Bhagavad Gita. These are wisdom words asking for guidance from a greater source than mere ego, a non-dual stance of surrendering my own limited beliefs of a smaller self, and trusting in the intelligence of a truer self. 

it's just letting go...

and allowing life itself, 

in all of its spontaneous wonder, to take over.

the truth is, I often make a mess out of my little part of the world, thinking that I know best and forging ahead with my own ideas and plans. When I'm able to step aside and allow life, God, the Tao, to lead me in the right direction, providing me with proper words, the more apt I am to be happier and fulfilled. It's only when I cling to my own sense of knowing best that I make a mess of things. Yet I find that I still place my intuition and wisdom guidance aside and listen to my ego's voice, even after all these years and surely knowing better.

true surrender is hard it seems.

so each morning I pray...

where would you have me go? What would you have me do? What would you have me say, and to whom? 

and then I simply listen.

~

Peace, Eric

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Nothing to Forgive Here 

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Nothing to Forgive Here

Nothing to forgive here:

forgiveness largely happens on it's own, Our only real effort is one of remembering the original innocence of this moment and allowing ourselves to stay here. That's really all forgiveness is, just the reduction of a wandering mind to those thoughts of past hurt, to keep returning again and again to the present moment until not even a husk of a painful memory remains to cause us any harm. Anything other than this only serves as a ritual for our return to the present moment - 

our original innocence is always right now.

and there is nothing to forgive here.

~

Peace, Eric 

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From This Point On

From this point on:

as everything else is just prepares me for this surrender - that's the entirety of my practice, every struggle with an asana, each time my mind wanders from the mantra, 

there is always a surrender.

that's where the magic is for me, a sweet spot of letting go and finding myself within the free fall. My truest self is found here, unencumbered, no longer holding on to any false sense of balance. I find myself first in motion and then the stillness of surrender, poised, and without concern of anything beyond the freedom of this moment.

my every effort brought me here.

yet serve me no longer.

from this point on....

there's just the letting go.

~

Peace, Eric

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: Everything We Need

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