Ksama

Ksama: 

it's a mind asana, ksama, which is a Sanskrit word for forgiveness, and with every word of that ancient language, so much more is layered in its meaning. Sanskrit words are often meant to convey qualities of virtue, not just a single action of label but an actual way of living. Ksama too is such a word and it is deep in the gifts that it offers. Here' we're not asked to forgive in any traditional sense, but to hold it deep as a posture of the mind an asana that is returned to throughout the day and lived as an expression of divine grace. There's an implied strength within the word, forbearance, that we are meant to return to this as a practice, building a stamina of forgiveness that carries us through life. This is also the forgiveness of surrender, releasing others of long held resentments, refusing to judge or hold a grievance, and knowing that this is our own true path of salvation. 

it's the yoga of forgiveness. 

and so for me, 

A Course in Miracles has become my yoga - it's my forgiveness path, ksama in its purest sense of grace and purpose. I've been led to this point, countless asanas, endless repetition of mantra, and cultivating prana though my breathwork. All valuable practices, preparing for me for a final letting go...in the end, moksha, liberation, is freedom from the heaviness of grievances. 

forgiveness is enlightenment. 

it's the path that takes us home...directly so.

~

I love you, Eric

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Finally

Finally;

from this point on I will step back and let the Holy Spirit lead the way. Of course I've made this declaration countless times since my first encounter with this lesson from A Course in Miracles, and with equal sincerity every time. This morning, early and before the sun even hints at rising, I consider the lesson once more - there's no declaration made, it doesn't come to me as another grand announcement. It's much softer now, more of a grace than any sense of an achievement. I no longer wish to be in charge. I'm tired of my own self-created mess. 

I will step back and let Him lead the way.

and not in resignation,  

but relief.

being grateful to finally relinquish the role of leading the way.

it's time.

I love you, Eric

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Little Further Now

A little further now:

much like those balancing yoga postures that I've learned to lean into, every aspect of my life seems to have come to the same precarious balance now. I'm being asked to trust in a deeper way than ever before, frighteningly close to an edge that promises no assurance to the ego's wish for certainty. I think this is where I'm supposed to be, not without fear, but amidst the accumulated doubt of an entire lifetime, my insecurities and questions of self-worth -   

everything gathered right here.

forgiven,

all at once, and then let go.

trusting that it's time...to lean a litter further now. 

~

I love you, Eric

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Lean

Lean: 

I love the balancing postures, two in particular each morning, vrikshasana, or tree pose, and natarajasana, also called the dancer's pose. Both of these poses require trust, being mindful of just the right shift of balance to continue the posture a little while longer. What I'm trusting is not only the body, but ground beneath my feet and the very air that seems to support be when I reach the point of feeling perfectly poised and stead. It sometimes feels like I could hold each of these asanas forever, an eternal yogi trusting that a greater force will hold him. And fairly often too I stumble from the pose, as if the air defeated me and gravity frowned upon my effort to defy it. Lately though, my trust has grown, deepened into something nearly describable - 

I'm being held. 

not propped to support the the pose, and not always with a sense of ease, but with a grace that whispers to me that every fall and tug of gravity is in perfect order for the lesson of the moment. I'm not asked to trust that each asana will be perfect, no, it's that they will be perfectly expressed in such a way that I learn to remember to smile through every shift of balance. Trust is dynamic, requiring deep listening and keen inner sight that takes us beyond the appearance of what the moment offers. I know that each fall doesn't remove me from the hold of grace, but only furthers my commitment to smile and lean even deeper into the unseen arms that always hold me. 

it's trust.

and every morning...

I lean just a littler further.

~

I love you, Eric

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With The Holy Spirit

With the Holy Spirit: 

turning even my morning yoga asana practice over to the Holy Aspect, guided into each posture as to what is absolutely right for me to perform. This wasn't something that I willfully did, it wasn't a conscious surrender, and I unaware that I was being guided until I compared my practice from over a year ago to what I do now. My yoga has become a fine art of listening to this holy voice, shifting sequence without notice, holding a pose for just the right amount of time before letting go. There's a greater rhythm here and it's far beyond my own. The softest nudge and intuitive sense causes me to move in just the right way for the healing of my body to occur. My mornings have a peaceful reverence now, beyond mere ritual and routine, there's a guidance in every move that carries on throughout the day. More so than ever I'm beginning to trust the Holy Spirit, not an outside source, but the very voice for God that speaks through every cell of my body, informs just the right thought, and urges me to continue in this subtle art of listening...even as it guides me through my yoga practice. 

not a whisper to be left unheard.

I'm listening now.

finally. 

~

I love you, Eric 

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Home

Home: 

all guilt is trickled down, small testaments of our believed great sin of separation from God. Yet this was an imaginary act, a dreamed journey without distance as A Course in Miracles reminds us. My own return home to God lies through the release of guilt, and in this relinquishment I take you with me. This is our journey, together, and I wish to know us both as innocent once more. Forgiveness shows us both the truth of who we truly are...and I now see you, again, in the light of this of love. 

with this...we go home,

together.

~

I love you, Eric

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The Holy Sprit's Book of Living and Dying

 

The Holy Spirits Book of Living and Dying: An Essential Guide to Grief.

(Based on the Principles of A Course in Miracles) 

10 Sutras to live by. 

1. The Jolt

There is no death. Get over it. What God has created cannot be lost. Ever.

2. The Shadow

Stop giving belief to shadows on the wall. The light that is the source of a shadow’s creation is still shining brightly—eternal, and right behind us.

3. The Actor

An actor wears a costume and plays a believable character. When the play is over, they shed both to return to their true self. The actor does not cease to exist just because the costume is put away.

4. The Spirit

In grief we see an empty chair; Spirit sees a full heart. Trust the heart, for the eyes have been trained to only see what is temporary.

5. The Distance

There is no space between minds. If we think of anyone with love, we are holding their hand. It is that simple.

6. The Ego’s Game

Grief is the ego’s way of trying to prove that God failed. Peace is Spirit’s way of proving that only love is real and survives every temporary belief in loss.

7. The Cemetery

Don’t look for the living among tombstones and bones. Souls don’t belong to bodies or boxes. They live in the presence of our heart. Always now. Always now.

8. The Bridge

Forgiveness is the bridge that connects us to our loved ones. Drop the grievance against "endings" and we will find they never left.

9. The Inheritance

They didn’t leave us their absence; they left us their love. Absence is a nightmare. Love is our reality, and it serves as our connection right now.

10. The Awakening

We are dreaming of a loss that never happened. Wake up and find that in the mind of God—where everyone resides together and forever—everything is still whole.

Dedication:

To my father...who taught me to be a caregiver. 

And to continue so.

Introduction

This small eBook was inspired by the title of The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, as well as the core princile of A Course in Miracles - that only love is real, and nothing unreal exists. The essential is never loved. And we are essential. May this book be helpful. 

Afterward

I hope this book found you. And that it was helpful. Whoever you are. 

I love you, Eric