The Path Itself

With another 50k fast approaching this weekend and the Croatan 24 Hour event not too far ahead thoughts of priorities have been running through my mind. I have set some significant PR's this year - from 5k to 50k along with covering some new distance - some key races have not gone as planned and it's likely due to over racing and over training in between. After Croatan the plan is for some major rest and a break from longer races until at least January. And yet in reflection I realize that being the fastest runner in the field has never been my goal - to be faster, yes - but the race itself is the goal. I enjoy being out there, on the trail or the run and running the long miles and seeing the scenery again or for the first time. There is a Buddhist saying that the path itself is the goal and that rings true with me.

Peace
Eric

Transcendence

Transcendence. My one pursuit. All streams lead to this ocean. Meditation, poetry and long distance running are the means I use to reach this state. All have provided a glimpse or somewhat longer - a moment caught within this timeless realm. Yet more miles, and longer time on the mediation cushion fail to deliver any more than just this taste. It takes less effort  - a surrender of self to a moment of simply being. It's no longer a goal - it's an act of letting go.
And this is where I'm heading.

Peace,
Eric

Unseen

Winds blow
Unseen –
Yet every leaf knows the
Taste of their caress.

I have no doubt of
Your embrace.

 

~

 

Faith. Our world relies upon the unseen yet ever present. We too are part of this natural order - a bird is born with the faith of flight and never doubts the sky's embrace - and no less then flight and infinite skies for us as well - have faith in the worlds embrace.

 

Peace,

Eric

Listening With The River

To sit and listen with the
river...

As a breeze whispers secrets
through the grass.

And birds sing nothing to the air but
the carried flight of their
expansion.

The river moves in stillness.

While I sit in the quiet motion of
my thoughts -

Listening with the river.

 

 

~

 

Everything is revealed through stillness - motion weaves its story only as a caress against a moment held still. Sit quietly. Listen. Nature has secrets she will share.

 

Peace,

Eric

My One And Only Obamacare Rant

I don't write too may political post and my hope is to (one day) transcend political boundaries all together and see and live from a higher perspective. It's hard for me to imagine that there is someone who doesn't feel that everyone deserves health care - and care is the operative word here. I believe that for the most part people are arguing politics and details and while these may be worthy topics of discussion and debate there are millions of people who are going without care. This needs to change. There are promises in Obamacare that I hope are true and there are some points made by it's opponents that I hope are not - regardless I wish that we could put politics aside and focus on the care. If the Affordable Health Care Act is a bust we will know soon enough and can regain focus on an alternative plan. Yet what if it works? What if people who are in desperate need for care receive it? Isn't it worth the chance? If presented with an alternative option that would help more and cost less I would jump at the chance and I believe so would the President - and leaders of both political parties. A true leader seeks to heal. Regardless of party I would and will follow someone who has this as their main agenda. I hope this law works not for political means but for those who need the care it may provide. It's happening now and so has my support. If another plan promises more than lets act -immediately. I pray that we pull together as a people and support not a Bill, not a Law and not a political party - but each other.

Peace,
Eric

Hollowed Weed

And I am
As a hollowed reed
Swayed by life's most passionate
Winds - emptiness mourned
As solitary sound.


And yet I am
As a hollowed reed
Played holy by the whispered
Breath of God - a singular instrument
Within a symphony of sound.

I am
A
Hollowed
Reed.

 

 

To become a witness to our duality is to see beyond it - we are at once both fragile and unbreakable, time bound and infinite, ego and spirit. To see past duality we become wise that all that is not spirit is an illusion bound in time, space and matter. Our reality rest in the Absolute and yet we have precious moments to know ourselves holy in this moment now. Lets not waste a single one.

 

Peace,

Eric

Don't Be That Person (Vegan Topic Warning For Those Who Are Sick Of Vegan Topics)

Some people love to champion their food addictions and they love to make fun of a vegans passion for ethical eating. There is what they're joking about -



Funny stuff huh?
I don't suffer from the delusion that I feel the pain of other beings any more than a non-vegan does - but I do make myself more aware of it, I don't shy from the reality of their suffering and make lame jokes about it so I won't have to confront my own ethics and my eating habits. Those who witness animal torture daily and participate in their mistreatment slowly change and compassion- just like a muscle - atrophies with lack of use. I understand why people don't want to see where their food comes from - it's horrible - and I know that a joke makes it easier to turn away and continue eating in a manner that is inhumane to animals, deadly to the planet and unhealthy to the consumer. Yet our capacity for compassion and compassionate action will continue to shrink and it will become easier to turn away from the suffering of others as well. Don't become that person.

Peace,
Eric

A Season of Letting Go

 

 

I ask the Spring
leaves...

"Why do you cling?"

And the answer later falls to
me...in Autumn shades of
wonder.

 

 

Happy autumn. This is the season of letting go and in the process setting ourselves for a new spring of becoming. Letting go is a magical act of accepting our spacious nature and knowing that even as all things must pass so too are all things are connected and that loss is only an illusion. May this season bring each of you peace, joy and all blessings.

 

Peace,

Eric


Conestoga 10 Mile Trail Run - Race Notes

Tired legs today. That was the theme. Sometimes we can't run on the legs we wish for so we run on the legs we have and that was today. Conestoga 10 Mile Trail run is always an adventure -from the shuttle but to the race start, the never ending hills and this year the slick course. It's all part of the fun. The Race Director Bill Smith takes great pride in this course - you can hear it in his voice and see it in his eyes during the last minute instructions. And everyone who finishes the race should be proud as well - it's that tough. And it's beautiful. Pennsylvania is a rugged state and this trail gets the best of it - rocky, rooty and I think I mentioned the hills, right?
Today was a little rough for me race wise. Coming off of several weeks of heavy racing and training left me with little to give to the hills and not a whole lot of speed on the down hills either. Early on I settled for a finish and time on my feet for Croaton 24 Hour that's fast approaching and to leave a little something in my legs for Blues Cruise 50k in two weeks. It was great feedback and hopefully I won't be too thick headed to heed it.
So race number 5 at Conestoga is in the books and I'm gunning for 20 - 15 more to go!

Peace,
Eric

Upcoming Events

Stay tuned for race report for Conestoga Trail Run either tomorrow or Monday. As mentioned it's my favorite trail race of all. This will be the first in a series of fall and early winter racing - with the main goal being the Croatan 24 Hour Endurance Run. My plan is to do some low heart rate training and little racing after this even November 9th while I gear up for another run at some 100 mile/24 hour races in 2014. My body is due for a rest and a few easy weeks should do the trick and I'll be running strong through next year. I'm exited about the upcoming races and future possibilities. Stay tuned my friends!

Peace,
Eric

Attachments, Freedom and Our Addictions

Well it seems that I should be writing about attachments today - that has been the direction the universe has been pushing me towards. From an audio program I was listening to in my car, to a random quote from the Bhagavad Gita, to several post on Facebook this afternoon. So here goes - attachments lead to suffering. Free from attachments we while we will still experience the ups and downs of a well and long lived life, we will be free from any suffering usually accompanying said life. Pretty simple. And fairly easy to accomplish - recognize the nature of our suffering - and release. So, than, why is it so hard and so infrequently practiced by so many? Well, that's simple too really - it's because we're addicted to both our pleasures and pains. We're addicted to thoughts and constant motion and distractions and we're afraid to let them go. We're afraid that without our addictions we would be nothing. And we're right. Without motion we are stillness. Without thought we are being and without attachment to pain and pleasure we are free. Simple. And not quite so frightening. Yet a lifetime of addiction takes a bit of time to overcome -maybe not a lifetime - but some time, some practice and lots of patience and care. We have time to practice.

Peace,
Eric

Complicated

Life seems complicated. And much of it is - modern times have escalated the pace of daily life to frantic levels. Yet spiritually we have few, simple tasks at hands - to be grateful and to forgive. And to further simplify - be grateful for everything that crosses our path and forgive all things that offend the ego. This means everything - as A Course in Miracles states - there are no justified resentments. Life may indeed be complicated - but our spiritual response to it is not.

Peace,
Eric

Purpose of This Blog

The purpose of this blog is to simply be the
space that's open to
receive.

There is generally no agenda and nothing planned ahead until I'm facing the page - I ask for words and sometimes they're the right ones and sometimes not - I suspect the quality is dependent upon my openness and ability to listen to the silence from which all words originate from.

The purpose of this blog is to start here - with space and
willingness and to take just a bit of that back to the
rest of my day.

Peace,
Eric

Speed Play

Due to several weeks of appointments that made heading tot he track for my weekly track workout difficult I opted for fartlek style runs. For those who may not know fartlek is a Swedish word that translates to "speed play" I always picture dolphins surging and leaping when I think of this word. Watch a dolphin in the ocean and it's playful nature and pure love of motion is evident - dolphins have that "Buddha smile" I have written so often about. A fartlek run can be structured or unstructured - many argue that by its very nature (play) it must be unstructured but freedom is often found within boundaries we pain ourselves - self expressionism painting isn't just paint splashed against the canvas - the artist has a structure that he is following although he may be the only one who knows what it is. It's an artist's privilege. One of the things I really hope to convey to other runners is that the trails and roads are your medium, your canvass and you can pain the run in any manner you wish - the structure is the run itself, the trail, or the nature of the workout you wish to do. Don't buy into labels - even self created ones.
So I've been enjoying the speed play and think I will avoid the track for the next few months - it's a good time to play right now.

Peace,
Eric

Little Note About Conestoga Trail Run

This Sunday will be my fifth running of the Conestoga 10 mile trail race - arguably the hardest 10 trail race on the east coast. It wouldn't surprise me if it was. It's steep, often muddy, slick in some spots and rocky in most. There's a hand over hand mud climb in the first mile. It's not an "adventure race" it's an adventure. It's also everything that's great about trail racing - remote, wild and beautiful. People gather from all over to share in this experience and bond by their common effort. I love this race. Afterwards as runners mingle in the pavilion for the after party there is a look familiar to all who run trail races such as Conestoga - it's the look of someone who has seen the edge of what they can endure - and took one step a little farther.

Peace,
Eric

Freedom of The Hills

Years ago when I had a passing interest in alpine climbing (never progressing past passing due to lack of actual alpine) I read the ultimate "how to manual" Mountaineering: Freedom of The Hills. Aside from what to do if a lung is impaled by an ice pick not much information was retained. But that titles - that title struck a soul chord the vibrates still. Every ultra and every trail run that title plays through my being like a song. It's the essence of trail running - freedom of the hills - and it's my race mantra - releasing me from any expectation and obligation other than my own. And even then it frees me from my own demands of ego - true freedom is expressed in a runners smile and not just stride - if I am running with a Buddha smile than I am running free - and that smile is found not by effort but by release alone. Effort is the vehicle that brings us to surrender - the magic happens after - when we're released from every demand save motion. I was blessed to run with that magic yesterday. Truly blessed.

Peace,
Eric

Race Review - Gunpowder 50k 2013

Wonderful day on the trails today! Gunpowder 50k was my very first ultra back in 2009 and it broke me in for what to expect in future runs - bee stings, rocks, roots and some hills - a near perfect course! So of course it was the same in 20013 - bee stings included.
The race is organized by the Baltimore Road Runners Club and it is a Fat Ass event - very low key, limited aid - but these guys know what runners need so not a thing was lacking. Very well organize! A big thanks to all the volunteers out there today.
The plan wasn't to run this race hard but to get time on my feet for the next few tough ultras coming up. I had the good fortune to run with some great friends both old and new and this helped the miles fly by. The multiple bee swarms also increased my tempo but not enough to avoid being stung. Actually it was wasps which is good and bad - good because they don't die after they sting (I like bees - even waspy ones) but bad because they keep freaking stinging you. Lots of people got stung today I've heard. So aside from the bee interval sprints the pace was steady and not too hard - we took plenty of time for photo ops - bee stings including one action shot of particular stubborn bee who refused to leave Paula's ankle until he had his photo taken. Aside from the bee I took a stump to the head. Actually it was a broken branch under a fallen tree on the trail that caught me on the head. It became a stump after volunteer looked at it and told he thought the stump was still in - that was a little unsettling and I was afraid it would upset my balance - hard to run with a stump hanging from the forehead but I don't think it was actually in there. It did bleed an awful lot though and was tough to beat as a badge of honor. Ultrarunners are definitely a weird breed. The total count between Paul and I was 8 bee stings, two falls, lost toenail and a stump stuck in the head. That more than proves my case in point - we kept running and we kept smiling. It was that kind of day.
I want to mention that I ran with Tailwind as my only fuel and again it worked great. As the effort increases and the races grow longer I will have to experiment with calorie/serving ratio per hour or add in some calories from fruit. It's so much easier though than worrying about my fueling strategy  though.
And that's it - Gunpowder 50k 2013 is in the books!
Thanks for reading.

Peace,
Eric

Gunpowder 50k

Tomorrow will be a chance to revisit my first ever ultra at the Gunpowder 50k Fatass run - I ran this in 2009. I'm not sure if I will run the whole 50k tomorrow or just half and do another run in the evening on my own. In any case it's a chance to reflect on where my running is going in the future and how far it has come since this first race. I can honestly say that I am happy with both directions - forward and past. Perhaps I'll reflect more on this in another post. I will say that's it's been a remarkable journey these past few years and the relationships I've made and the miles I've run are both a thing to be cherished.

Peace,
Eric

The Cloth of Meditation

Years ago I read of how the Navajo Indians of the American South West would dip a cloth into a container of dye and then let it dry. The first dip there was little noticeable difference - nor on the second, third and after even a dozen or so more the cloth was still mostly the original color. However with the patience and care of repeated dipping and drying the cloth eventually became the solid color of the dye - and stayed that way despite the harsh climate the Navajo lived in. It's the perfect metaphor for meditation - we dip into the still, quiet pool of spirit - and we emerge to the often harsh climate of reality feeling little different in our response to it. Yet with the patience and care of daily meditation we will eventually become the solid color of spirit - and stay that way.

Peace,
Eric

Runner Smile/Buddha Smile

I  think that of all the traits developed through meditation - equanimity may prove most useful not only navigating through life but on the trails for ultrarunners as well. Running long distance certainly trains our minds and bodies to handle suffering - but to handle it with grace is a sign of a runner who has learned to empty themselves of the need to balance pain and pleasure. These runners have found the deeper joy of equanimity - they know that both pleasure and pain are fleeting and literally take both in stride. Their true joy is the journey and each step is a journey begun and completed within itself - no more and no less - one step is simply enough and it's this repeated moment to moment, mindful connection to their body and surroundings that get them to the trails end. There are hard miles to reach this lesson and there are means of achieving this through mindful running - the simple path is to let go of demands called forth by the ego - spirit always urges letting go, a surrender to what is present now and not what we may wish for instead. Ego may wish for faster times, a steadier stomach, fresher legs - and all these may be nice to have in a race of any distance - but they're not guaranteed in an ultra. Or in life. Equanimity means accepting the conditions we are faced with now, working with them and at the same time knowing that this too shall pass - our legs may come back and our stomachs may settle - either way the runner runs (or walks if they have to) and all the while-  beneath the passing state of all conditions - they keep their Buddha smiles.

Calm Abiding

I love the Buddhist practice of calm abiding - of just sitting with the breath amidst the chatter of my thoughts and the chaos of all that may be happening about me. The wandering mind returning once and again and perhaps a dozen times yet always returning to the breath, to the calm center of being. Sometimes even the breath falls away and there is no "I" left - only simple awareness and a choice less attention to all that passes. That is the deeper joy of equanimity. The Buddha said that all that is now will someday not be - and so we suffer as we cling to the ten thousand joys and rebel against the equal number of pain and sorrows. Life is suffering the Buddha taught and more he taught the way to live past suffering and live with real joy. We train our minds by steadying our awareness on the breath - all that comes and all that passes and still we stay gently aware of the breath - and even as our attention fades we find our way - countless times, countless times - we find our way back. All things pass. Nothing remains. Not thoughts. Not conditions. Not happiness nor sorrow. Yet in the passing there is a wake of truth - awareness, pure awareness and a deep abiding joy of simply being. This is who we are, who we have always been and who we will return to being once we see and see past the impermanence  of all things material. Ad with that we find equanimity.

Peace,
Eric

The Edge

The theme of emptiness and running seemed to hit a familiar chord with runners - perhaps helping to define a profound experience that lacked a clear perception. Or maybe just a shared sense of belonging  to a community that has spent the time emptying themselves of self through time and much distance. Those who have touched the edge of greater worlds bear the stamp that marks their journey. I don't think we always come back from these inner excursions with answers - sometimes we are only left with more questions. And that's what keeps us on the edge.

Peace,
Eric

The Empty Runner

Buddhist place a great deal of emphasis on the concept of emptiness. Far from being the western idea of barren or lacking in any potential it is actually quite the upset. Emptiness allows the possibility of all things to exist - it is the primordial space of existence. Meditation helps us realize our inherent emptiness by slowing the mind down and allowing us to explore the space between our thoughts. In a very profound way running long distances does the same - a runner empties himself through motion until only the space of simply being remains. Perhaps this is why runners give so much of themselves to their races and long training runs - they're searching for the still point of their existence within the motion - the truth of their reality. Only time and distance will let us know for sure.

Peace,
Eric

Critical Mass

At a certain point in our emotional lives - and given a little insight and thoughtfulness - I think that most will come to the conclusion that the pets we love and the animals we hold in torture pens and slaughter for our plates are really the same in their own emotions and wishes for love, companionship and space. Some of us get there sooner - I'm not sure why -and then we grow impatient for others to reach this point as well. When enough people do reach this level of concern for all beings there will be a critical mass and we will see a giant paradigm shift in how and what we eat. I'm happy to be part of this movement - and wish for you to join along.

Peace,
Eric

No Difference

In the end - there is no difference between giving and receiving. The exhale is blessed with the in breath and rain is given to the earths many blossom. It's a cycle of replenishment and often so subtle we fail to notice all we give and receive through the course of a day. So give without fear and receive with grace - we are part of the infinite cycle of life.

Peace,
Eric

My Quest

At first I thought it was the miles, the distance. And speed. How far could I go and how fast would I get there - a mantra for the mind and body. I still love a fast race and to push for distance. 100 miles is still my goal. Yet my quest is quite different. It's ineffable - a silent mantra for the soul. And that's what keeps me moving.

Peace,
Eric

Race Thoughts

So my longest timed race (12 hours) didn't go as planned but it was a great learning experience and leaves me time to better prepare for the 24 hour event in November. Last weekends race was on a more technical trail than I had thought it would be and a little hillier - made it a little harder to get into the zone I had hoped for. I still very much enjoyed the race and the thought of timed events still intrigue me very much. My preparation is now very much geared into a successful 24 hour run - with success being measured as still on the course at the end of the time limit. Mileage is less important although I do hope to reach the 80+ miles. Any readers who participate in these events please feel free to send tips and advice - all would be greatly appreciated.

Peace,
Eric

Some Runners

There were some runners at last weekends Labor Pain 12 Hour Endurance Trail Race who made it look absolutely effortless - lap after lap with the same look of composure and focus. I'm in awe of such runners. Their talent is evident and there is no doubt that they have put in the training to back that natural ability up. To run like that is the dream and keeps me training hard.
There were also runners who obviously lacked the physical gifts of the lead runners - yet they too ran lap after lap on sheer grit and determination. Perhaps simply for the love of what they were doing. I'm in awe of such runners. Their commitment is evident and there is no doubt that they have put in the training to back that love and will power up. To run like that is the dream and keeps me training hard.
A deep bow to all of these runners.

Peace,
Eric

Race Review - Labor Pain 12 Hour Endurance Trail Run 9/1/13

The Labor Day 12 Endurance Trail Run this weekend was my longest timed event and a great prep for the 24 Hour Croatan run coming up in November. It was a surprisingly tough 5 mile course with plenty of rocks and enough hills to make it a little more interesting and entertaining - none of the hills were "deal breakers" but they added up through the course of the day. The event is put on my Pretzel City Sports and they are a top notch, professional group who know runners and their race needs. I have heard quite a bit about this group through the last few years but this was my first event. Definitely won't be my last.
 As mentioned the course is a (measured) 5 mile loop and runners have 12 hours to complete as many (or as few) as they wish. Along with a shirt and mug given to participants a great looking jacket is given with a signature mileage stamped on the front- 26.2, 50k, 40 miles, 50 miles and 100k - this is great incentive to keep moving! My original goal was 50+ miles but the humidity was pretty thick even so early in the morning and I knew that would be tough - throw in the unexpectedly rocky trail (it's Pa, I should have known there were rocks) and 50 began to seem like a long shot. By mid afternoon I decided to get in 40 (maybe 45) and call it a day. Some shoes issues and a loose feeling knee made this a wise decision by the end of the day. I got in 40 for the signature jacket - thought about 45 but a threat of a storm and what would have been a lot of walking on that last loop kept me in. Of course it didn't storm so now I'm second guessing myself but this morning I felt good enough to workout and run so maybe it was for the best.
There were some simply amazing runners out there who made it look effortless of the trail - truly awesome and inspiring. I have more work to do.
My fuel was Tailwind Nutrition  - an all in one sports drink - it provides the calories and electrolytes an endurance athlete needs in on shot. I mixed in 1.5 to 2 scoops (150 to 200 calories) and drank one bottle per hour. This is fairly light in calories for a long even such as this yet hunger was never an issue through the day. 10 hours of Tailwind along with 4 bananas spread through the day and no major issues - I adjusted the amount as my hunger and thirst dictated. It's a great product and I love that I don't have to second guess my nutrition during a race. I kept the calories purposely lower so that I could add a little fruit as well and that was a nice edition but not really needed. Three scoops (300 calories) may be an option as well for my next long event. Ultra Runners are an experiment of one.
It was a great weekend, a wonderful even and a learning experience - I'll be back next year for sure. Please check out Pretzel City Sports http://www.pretzelcitysports.com/laborpain.html and Tailwind Nutrition - http://www.tailwindnutrition.com/
Thanks for reading!

Peace,
Eric