No Agenda

 

No agenda:

as for me, I just found myself with a wish to drop it all - no longer the host of labels long collected, with little need to know myself as anything more than simply being. Everything still belonged, life continuing exactly as before. But now I run, without being a runner. I meditate for just this moment on the cushion, no promise of anything more. I write with no agenda, little concern for any meaning I may offer - I simply like the sound words. 

this is the ease of being, nothing sacrificed to be anything other than what I am right now. I won't give it further labels. Of course life still brings complications, and often I am lost again in the details of the world, a quick forgetting of myself as I participate in life's demands. But I never truly become anything, nothing sticks past the moment that it happens. It's a nice taste of freedom, knowing that life will be exactly as it is without control from me, that I don't have to maintain a certain role, or uphold an image or a label. 

it's enough to be. 

even more, it's all I ever truly am - being, an aspect of life that's dynamic in expression. What could I possibly add to this? And why would I bother? Identity is a heavy weight to carry through the world, and brings little in the way of true joy. At some point, through no effort, nor will of my own, I simply lost track of this agenda. It's not that I have no identity, I still relate to the world in all the ways before - but I don't have to do anything for this to be, there's no agenda to weigh me down any longer. I'm lighter. 

that's enough for me, a lighter sense of being. It's an unearned grace and one I'm grateful to have found. So life continues, a bit more joy noticed than before. With that, I write these words with no agenda - simply liking how they sound. 

~

Peace, Eric