Self-Harm

my friend - what if there was no self to harm? Perhaps we seek to inflict pain on a self imagined for this purpose alone. that through our own spaciousness we doubt the form of our becoming and sensations offer proof in the belief of what we are. I don't know. But I care, I care for you, and I'm sorry that you suffer. My own journey of self inquiry has given me reason to doubt that I am merely form, just a body alone, one thing standing among other things in a world filled of things. It doesn't mean that I'm not the body, or part of this world (of things) but that body I once believed so strongly was mind, was simply occurring through the aware space of what I (we) really am. It's like the famous heart sutra of Zen - form is emptiness/emptiness form. It's not just once thing, it's not really both either - it's all things, at once, and always. 

So what if this is really, truly what we are - form, body, thought/emptiness, awareness? All at once. And if we are - then the self that you seek to harm, isn't really there at all. Just a brief appearance of gathered thought lending itself to the belief that it could be harmed. Even the impulse to hurt is only a sensation happening through the real, original you of spacious awareness. It's there, it has a reality for a moment, and then it's gone. Perhaps if it's seen, noted, and allowed its moment - it would simply pass along its way. Much like most of our thoughts do. 

Once again, I don't know. 

I'm just allowing these thoughts to come to me, writing them down, not knowing of they will ever find you, or help you if they do. 

They are much the same as our other thoughts, here, and then gone, only now written down and sent to you. 

What I do know is that these words are offered in love. 

And I hope that's enough for even a little comfort. 

_

Peace,

Eric