Yoga of My Headless Nature

Yoga of my headless nature:

in it's surest sense, this is yoga, a deep seeing of the reality of our connection. For me, this was to be witness to my own empty state of being, an examination of what is actually seen, and of only what's been surmised through belief and conditions. It's the yoga of my headless nature. 

it's a simple thing to see - or actually to not see at all and find an emptiness that somehow too holds all the world. Of course it's easier to just look than to explain. From any object, and this includes my own body, I trace the line of sight directly to it's source, traveling back to find the actuality of seeing. What I come to is the absence of a seer, no eyes in witness to themselves, no face to personally be seen. Looking, I find myself headless. 

to rationalize, it's easy to claim what others have seen, descriptions give, photos, and the reflection I receive from the mirror everyday. Yet this is all hearsay, secondhand assurance. I have never seen my own face, and have navigated the world from what others have described. To see myself headless was an awakening. What, and where I believed was the source of my every thought, my sure beliefs, and informed me of the world - was absent to my sight. 

the practice of yoga is to join the body to the true self, a reach to the divine and then to merge within the infinite source that's found. With one look, yoga practice by glance, this source was found present, no reach was ever needed. I only had to look in the right direction. 

but this is only half the practice (and not a practice at all) - to see this emptiness was to find my fulfillment as well, that was is truly seen is capacity, not empty of a single thing, but the promise to hold the entire world. And even further still. 

what's found is emptiness, and it's empty of all but purpose. 

continuing to look, seeing, and finding the absence of self and head - there is still the world, objects are present, thoughts existing. It's all just the same. Except different too. Now, in the absence of a head, I see my true awareness. Emptiness is meant to hold, an embrace without notion of personal self, infinite in the potential of its reach. My emptiness is full. 

this is a deepening experience, not ending with one knowing glance, but now a world given to explore. What is see is seamless, no lines to distinguish myself from it all, everything appearing simply as aware. A new world from the old has been given. This headless grace is always present, ready to receive with every glance and wish to see. 

my yoga is simply seeing. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Devotion of Another Kind

Devotion:

it's devotion of another kind, not towards a single figure, no item worshiped above all others - this is the openness of our true nature, inclusive to what it holds divine. Everything belongs in equal fashion, unconditional in not just acceptance, but in love as well. 

Indeed, only love is ever found. 

this is not the love of passion, it's not affection grown deep between people - this is the love without fail hinted by the Bible, yet more, it's the true devotion offered by our spacious nature. To this love, we always bring more, a capacity of endless expansion. Nothing is refused, compassion in a fierce sense, the world is simply held without our interference. 

of course this doesn't mean without involvement, we are active participants in the world, working with care to have a life that's filled with meaning. But there's no real say in how this all unfolds, we are unable to escape the course that life offers. This is the unconditional aspect of devotion, our embrace of the current moment without design for things to be other. What we find here is the immediate acceptance of everything that contradicts this moment - our denial, and every plan to shape the future different falls seamless to this hold. 

Everything belongs. 

our true devotion is unseen, infinite, and present through it all - it's subtle in its presence, so immediate and intimate that we fail to give notice. This too is the role of grace, that no effort is needed for this acceptance, life continues in it's flow, and our only role to simply live. We are devoted by design, spacious, and unconditional in this love. 

Nothing more is needed. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Of Simply Being

Of simply being:

it's the ease of simply being, no stress, nor strain to achieve a certain state of mind, no self that needs immediate improvement. Life itself is fine, and yes, even with its tragic moments and circumstances that leave us wrecked in passage. Through these events, life continues, never wavering in its course of possibilities and new beginnings. 

suffering is an inescapable aspect of life, and so too is our wish to avoid it and to better ourselves to the point of being untouched by life's sorrows. Yet we are never removed from the fullness of all the world offers - from the depths of losing what we cherish, to the joys brought by love and true connections, it's all gifted to the moment of our experience. 

Nothing more is ever promised. 

we take these moments as handed, and no response is really ever a refusal - our grief doesn't deny any loss, but brings focus to our present sorrow. Suffering isn't optional, not anymore than joy can can be avoided, both belong to the moment that their given, entwined through the very fabric of all life offers. To know of one is to hold the other in awareness, not to contrast between, but to see that life is not selective in its flow, we are all touched in similar ways of loss and bounty. 

We know of life and all it offers. 

my own sense, now, is one of simply being - I won't escape life unharmed, and already there's been sorrow to the point of my surrender, as well as such joy to bring me to my knees in deep appreciation. I've known life fully. Through it all there was no escape as to what came, for every circumstance avoided, life brought equal in another way. This is karma in it's truest and only sense, that life is motion and action, and reality will not bend to my demands or wishes. Life happens, and with this simplicity I relax to its grace and mystery, accepting each moment in it's arrival, as well any wish for things to be other. It all belongs, nothing excluded, nor denied. This is the true ease of simply being...and it all happens completely on it's own. 

~

Peace, Eric 

To Serve

To serve:

of service, and always so - through every means of my existence. It's a system of exchange, a biological trade energetic resource. Everything, of even smallest detail, benefits to the whole. What I am, from cell to breath, is a function of well being. To be alive, to exist - is to serve. 

Truly than, I belong to the world.

and on more subtle level still, my reality is of openness, a spacious hold that serves only for this belonging. My emptiness is a necessity, recognizing my own formlessness allows for me to see the world through a seamless hold. More than mere emptiness, I am fulfillment of the worlds potentiality, lending my capacity for the solid reality of appearance. 

Emptiness lends itself to form.

always it's an equal exchange, that I am not empty of, but capacity for - again, the world serves for my fulfillment, to bring purpose to this infinite hold. Everything is in constant trade of subtle essence, objects not existing apart from the air of their surrounding, space not being separate from the form of its caress. It's one thing in service to itself, something that can be described as my true giving nature, never fully complete until the world appears.

Your appearance serves for my fulfillment.

so, more than service - it now comes to pure devotion. That I exist at all is for my capacity to hold you, emptiness abiding to the moment you appear. Without true borders we are simply space for another to exist in similar function. We are of constant service for each other. 

To serve - we only have to be. 

~

Peace, Eric 

A Personal Science

A personal science:

it's a personal science, my own investigation of the world - of what appears each moment, how it all unfolds and subtle changes, and if anything remains steady through its motion. It's about my own belonging. My experience is the focus, from each sense there comes a momentary experiment, a current happening that informs me of a certain aspect of attention. 

to begin with listening, it's the experiment of dawn, before my eyes even open - I hear the world come to me, sounds muted through my slow awakening. Everything is heard softly. My first note is of receiving, nothing is asked for, sounds arrive in early gifts. Birdsong's singing me awake. Cars in distant travel. Yet something of me remains quiet, still, a simple listening. To this, my eyes now open.

my morning is aware. 

again, the world comes to me - seeing is sudden, but gentle too in it's arrival. Opening my eyes, and it all appears, nothing has been asked for, I am gifted dawn, a new day, and whatever may unfold. I'm seeing, and it's all a first, cleansed of any day before, I see only what's now given. For just a moment, that first eyelid of awakening, there are no labels, everything just is for its own sake of reason. I'm without name, no story, just seeing, aware. It's a seamless morning, all flowing from the point of my awakening. What's seen is the reality of light, of the suns reach through the window, to finding my eyes, offering its touch of warmth and greeting. I wake to its display, light in soft becoming, one thing lending itself to the distinction of the morning, 

this is my awakening. 

my body too wakes in new sensations, to feel a brush of air against me, the touch of sun, and stir of early hunger. In first light, there is no memory what's occurred before, There's only now, awareness of the body, the feeling of a new world. It's the direct experience of simply being, true mindfulness. The person that belongs to this body, the self that will soon claim this morning - hasn't yet awakened. For now, for just an instant, there's only a world of sensations. 

soon though, thoughts begin to offer their opinion, I begin to label what's familiar, and the day starts in ordinary wonder. Yet, awareness remains. That first sense of it all arriving to a new moment is my reality, always there for notice. It's a call for a personal science, to explore the world as if I first awakened. Awareness is always available, the source which my day. Every moment is the same as what occurs at dawn. I wake to what is, another aspect of the world becoming. I only have to listen, to see, to feel what's now occurring. 

it's the personal science of aware. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Symbols Shared

Symbols shared: 

offering symbols, descriptions of the world perceived - it's all words just past their telling point, never quite capturing the moment that's been seen. These words aren't given as pointers to some reality that only I can see, our world is shared and we are joined through seeing it all together. What I give is my own description, hopefully poetic in form, and this moment, these symbols shared between us, belong to us both now. 

there is only one seeing, even through infinite eyes the world is seen from here alone. This is our true together, our meeting point of aware. If I trace any object of the world back to the source which holds the seeing - there is nothing to be found. It's the same emptiness every one of those infinite eyes would find. 

this is where we see the world. 

of course the role of emptiness is to be fulfilled, to lend itself as capacity through service for the world to be. From seeing, comes objects to be seen. To be aware, is to simply hold the world through our awareness, seamless, from emptiness to form. 

this is our fulfillment. 

again, symbols, these are only words about our seeing - and yet, perhaps, right now we see these words together, something shared between us, something formless, aware, and sensing this, we trace them back...

and see.

Peace, Eric 

Not Apart

Not apart:

that I'm not apart from it all, whatever's observed through sight, whatever sound is heard, every thought and sensation that occurs - it's all belongs to the moment of experience, always now,and at no point am I separate from this belonging. 

to this end, there even fails to be an observer, nothing set apart as the source of my awareness, watchful to all that matters. There's just this current happening of aware, free, inclusive, and unconditional and seamless in its hold. 

from here, inquiry ends, without witness there is no point of note - to come to this, and be let go, surrendered to what is, without the prop of self, or soul. Yet somehow too, everything remains the same, thoughts, beliefs, and life through every detail. But lightly now, lightly. 

through aware, the world is open to be explored. 

it's a subtle difference, from inquiry to exploration, and a bit further still to simply celebration of it all. There's no mark of measurement with this, no single point to claim awakening, it's just how life unfolds. To see, and find no lines drawn from my own beliefs of separation, that I am not apart from life's current flow, and how it comes to be my world. It's a mystery, and one without my need an answer. Here, than, is my point of celebration...

that I simply am, at all. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Just Listening

Just listening:

what's heard is seamless, sound inseparable from the stillness of its hold, and my own surrender to the listening. It's all one thing, a singular participation of aspects of the whole, with parts played to their perfection. There is no effort here, no performance of command. It's just listening, the simplicity of receiving the music of the world. 

to hear, it's my first meditation of the day, an inquiry of what arrives before my need to label - this, is original listening, early morning, and hearing the soft song of dawn. What comes to me is sound, familiar, yet never heard as this before. Each note is new. There is no act of listening, my ears don't strain to catch a sound. I wait, joined as stillness, and the morning plays for me. 

later, sometimes in an instant, it's all described - birds offering an early song, solitary cars softened by their distance, my own rhythm of heart and breath added to it all. But before I add my thought to this, it's just listening, pure, seamless, whole. 

my morning is received. 

this is how it always happens, every sound, that is all emerges from a silent hold, no reach to find ears, but simply left to hang through air, and coincide with where we are. What we hear is seamless, our own belonging played as sound. 

just listening...and we receive the world.

~

Peace, Eric 

Left Aware

Left aware:

when all else is questioned, and found to have no answers of their own, no substance that isn't seamless to it's touch of something other - now, I'm simply left aware, with everything belonging. It's the end of every inquiry, coming to bare essence, seeing. What remains is awareness. 

as well as always present - I am aware through every moment, and even as my attention wanders, it never strays from this point of hold, as if an endless harbor to safety of my travels. Awareness itself is the present moment, it's the motion of time through it's porous nature, change within an allowing void that stays changeless. 

everything belongs here, a seamless aspect of the whole - nothing can be excluded from awareness, and even my wish for a moment to be other, is found gentle in its hold. My comfort isn't through faith of anything changing, nor of another world to come, but of simply this acceptance. What is now, belongs, as well as my wish for things to change. There is power here, though not of my own, but life in all it offers. To find myself aware, accepting what is, brings my attention to the endless options of what's to be, of the always changing moment, that right now holds my present healing. 

my faith is always in the present moment.

there is no magic here, it's not a special point of being, no place to strive for, nor great spiritual achievement - it's simply being home, left aware, content. It's always been this way, the calm acceptance of my every storm. I've always been aware. We all have. It's our shared belonging. 

just waiting to be noticed. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Lightly

Lightly:

lightly, that my world is held a little lighter now, as if the gravity of my self concern lessened in it's pull. There is freedom here, yet not from a single thing, but the freedom to allow, to see how things belong in their own way, and length of stay. This too, is my own belonging - being an aspect of life without separation from the whole. 

it's a sense of interdependence, I am no longer at fault for conditions of the world, believing myself in charge of things beyond control - and yet to care, offering love, is my deep felt response. This is a natural compassion, coming from a true connection. 

to hold it all lightly, just a softer hold to what life offers, a lessening to any fear of loss, and sense of being incomplete. Life flows in its own course of grace and mystery. There is little that I truly control. But my freedom comes through this acceptance, to play my response well, with tenderness, and not give weight to my resistance. I belong to this flow, to both its grace and mystery, and there comes a great trust with this. I will be delivered to the only place I could arrive, and it's always exact, perfect in the only time it could possibly, ever be. 

life brings me always to this moment. 

there is nowhere else to be found, always here, now - and it's this moment that comes lightly, arriving to my response. From this point on, life continues in its flow, and I am lighter now, less weight to my concerns. 

lightly, lightly...the world goes on. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Another Pose

Another pose:

that it's just another pose, an image made purely from beliefs, and held for a given length of time. There is no true and certain self, only a presentation of the mind, thoughts gathered, believed, and displayed to show the world. What I really am is fluid, and only shown in motion. No image, of my own, nor those that others may believe - will ever capture this reality. 

in truth, I am no different than any other aspect of nature, what seems a product of time, measured by display. Every part of life at one time looks to be a pose, frozen for a moment, a flower in present bloom. Yet nothing stays in current fashion, life is constantly shifting to a new presentation of itself, no pose lasting more than just an instant. 

I am just as brief.

my difference from a flower is only of belief, that I believe my every presentation, each pose held in such a way to convince myself as well as world. No flower stays in bloom, stripped by winds and worn by rain, its petals fall away. Life stays in motion. A flower gives its bloom away without regard for all that follows, there is no pose, no beliefs invested. 

its beauty stays in essence.

through every pose, my truth remains - I am that which stays in motion, life, continuous in some way, and always a mystery. Awakening, there is less investment in what's presented, every pose is now held lightly, briefly, my petals worn away. 

something new, is now becoming.

~

Peace, Eric 

Of True Connection

Of true connection:

my one relationship, an onliness of true connection - that we equally belong to each other, bonded by the same giving space that allows for our existence. It's a relationship of one, of us all, and the most intimate that we could be. We share the very background of our being, emerging distinct, unique, but always found together. 

there is no me, without you.

this is the romance of existence, life through infinite entwine - our breath is of the same air, molecules in a constant trade of company. We are literally made of similar dust, our bodies formed from stars in one last giving action. There is nothing that we are, that is not shared. You are my one true connection, continuous, and so, through this, we carry on forever. 

to see this, my one relationship, I simply trace the view, any object, directly back to seeing - it's a seamless line, a return to the spaciousness which holds, and truly knows the view. Here, this emptiness, an aware waiting, is only filled by your appearance, by the world becoming through the space we offer. We are fulfilled by life. 

this is the only relationship.

and so, I'm never alone, even in moments of loneliness, there is always our together, our true connection, and the world we hold between us. 

~

Peace, Eric  

Yet Always So

 

Yet always so:

then, aware...and yet always so. This is awakening, no more than subtle shift in the perception of the moment. To be aware, but to suddenly see that is is central to my focus, that everything belongs within awareness without discrimination. The world is found here, life, and it's all welcomed, brought to my attention through a continuous flow of grace, and mystery. 

this is an obvious awakening, as easy as eyes opening to first light - it's the simple notice of what's always been present to my life, constant, and unchanging in its presence. To say, I am aware, is to announce this presence as reality. It's bringing the obvious to light. 

and the world unfolds from here, it's now open to explore in a new, yet somehow familiar way. It's seeing with true sight, how objects are found seamless within the view, just a continuous flow of one thing given to distinctions. To note a birdsong emerge from silence, how it lingers through the nothingness of air, and then fades to stillness once more. Everything is found whole, complete, without need of an added story, the world is perfect as it is.

with this insight, it's seen that perfect merely means connection, that events coincide in the only way that life allows, and that everything is instantly accepted in the moment it occurs. I am not helpless to the fates, but aware, and given power in my response. I am a participant in all that happens. 

this is not a final awakening, there is no single point to claim enlightenment. It's just being aware, at home now in the world, a bit more at ease, relaxed with how life unfolds. The irony is to awake to what is now,  and has always been, to find aware...yet always so. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Myself Aware

To find myself aware: 

that it's without effort, always present, and unwavering through its hold of my attention - to find myself aware is a constant surprise of wonder, and becomes a meditation of each moment. Nothing has to change, nor present itself in any different way for this to be. I'm aware, and life flows in details, offering a glimpse of my own reflection. 

to be aware is to find my true connection, yet deeper still, intimate - a seamless embrace of sight to object, silence to sound, and my own welcome to the sensations of the world. It's all without a veil of separation. Awareness is the end to every inquiry, without need of any answer but the stillness that it holds. And again, it's all gifted, not achieved through mantra, nor imparted from anyone who claims to know a secret, sacred way. 

it's what I am from birth to present moment.

ask, am I aware? 

and the world opens itself to this awareness, and more, that it always has, and this indeed was all I ever searched for, just this, aware, and knowing that it's so. To find myself aware, and that this is how I hold the world, everything equal in belonging, each item cherished through the same attention - it's my initial and final understanding...

that I am. 

~

Peace, Eric 

An Assumption

An assumption:

to declare myself as anything would be false to any moment - an assumption of belief, and even arrogant in my proclamation. Reality is so much more than I could ever say, and never once the same in the motion that it offers. Every moment is constant in its shift and rearrangement. I am never quite the same either, always a version of what I thought myself before. There is nothing to declare that isn't already arranged as something other, new in its presentation, and still in some subtle way, continuing in its change. 

life is never just the same as it was before.

it seems best to stay silent, to allow myself the spaciousness of being undeclared - to simply be, without need to show myself as anything other than life in motion. Yet what appears belongs as well, each version of myself is a once before truth, and every word written is a reflection of what was then believed. There is no real paradox to being - I am both emptiness undeclared, and too all that now appears. Life, in declaration it itself. 

so what to add to this? 

nothing, nothing needs to be added, nor taken from these words - it's all just life, happening without my interference. I sit to write, and words appear. Nothing has to be true, no deep meaning to be found. Simply life. With nothing to declare - it's all allowed to happen.

(and even this is an assumption) 

~

Peace, Eric 

My Own Story

 

My own story:

it's my own story, fictional and once believed - that I once thought my narrative was true, and that I was the author of it's theme. Of course life is real, I am informed by the pain and joy of my experiences, and have no doubt of what I feel. Yet not everything is true, and I am most certainly not the sole author of the story that unfolds. 

life is it's own story, a continuous happening of moments, and immersed in this, intimate to the point of one, my story is only told as life. There is no other tale. At least within the moment which occurs - it's later, another moment happening, that I narrate the details, remembering myself as in command. I make myself the author. 

but it's not really, entirely, my story, not my own - there are infinite aspect at hand, entwined, and all unfolding. Every part of me belongs to this full story. My body tells of every cell and molecule at play within these fields. I am not the author here, but simply part of their story. Life has me in its course, and I can find myself as no more than momentary current, carried through experiences, rich and varied in all that's offered. My response to everything is instantly life's story. 

it seems my real story is so much larger than believed, and I am only a character through such an epic tale. As such, I play my role in convincing fashion, with full range given to every scene that life provides. I am not limited to any script that's written, life is always fresh, new, and my response will always certain to each moment. 

my only role is just to be. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Something Else

Something else:

that I will be something else again, recycled to the dust or my origin, particles carried on - nothing but this sense of self is gone, my true life as nature continues in its use, reborn in subtle aspects of earth and sky. I will be again something new, my true life not ended. 

perhaps a certain sense will linger, moments, or maybe longer still - to this, I just don't know, and give it no concern. It seems to me that life is without definite conclusion, simply a return to mystery, and that life goes on through infinite trade of all the parts that made me. 

only mystery is sure.

and really, the something else that I become is no less than what I am now, already, and have always been - there is no aspect of life apart from me, a seamless existence, and that my appearance as this self is equal to every blade of grass, tree, and mountain, interdependent all, and belonging to this constant trade. In reality there is no something else, but only continuation through a different guise. 

what I am, without this sense of self - continues. 

so I will be found in other aspects, just as my life now belongs to all that came before, and is even at this point surrendering to something new. It's a subtle becoming, a shift of appearance really, and nothing essential is ever lost. 

only infinitely traded, 

~

Peace, Eric 

Freedom to Express

Freedom to express:

a philosophy of every given moment - lightly, lightly, it's all held to an easy belief, that any moment my certain truth can be upended. It's not about convictions, but a freedom to express, and be expressed, according to what the moment holds. I have no wish to be tied to any truth, no system of thought, nor standard not my own. 

each moment, held lightly.

it's simple philosophy, that I am informed by direct experience, present evidence offered only now - and even this is let go once the moment's gone. This my creative point, my start to every page, and where I wait for words to come. It's how my life is lived, it's how life is, a constant flow of new, nothing truly conserved beyond a certain point. 

everything is eventually let go.

this isn't something practiced, it happens completely on its own - each moment is a fresh beginning, empty of past value and measure. There is a rush of past to fill this void, patterns of belief and thought. As for me, at least for now, I find this unavoidable. It's just what happens. But to hold this all lightly, no extra weight applied, and I am free in a new creative fashion, to be expressed in ways belonging only to the moment. 

the world itself passes lightly, continuing of its own accord - my wish is to meet it with a light touch of my own, an easy, creative response that offers my concern, care, my love, and full compassion. It's not a wish to be right, to prove a point, nor convince the world to my way of thinking...

it's simply being, each moment, exactly as I'm found.

~

Peace, Eric 

By Grace Alone

By Grace alone: 

there's no practice to be grateful, it's spontaneous, natural, arising completely on it's own - nothing needs to be invoked, it happens all by grace alone. This is more about attention, to just notice that I'm alive, and given breath. I am thankful to simply be here, and from this point comes a deep appreciation. To find myself aware, experiencing life through every moment...

this is all that's needed.

and yet I don't discount rituals, symbolic acts can be beautiful in their motion and display - but they never bring forth anything that's not now found present. They're simply reminders of what's already here, overlooked, only needing to be seen. 

my ritual is the morning, my first glance to start the day, noting that all that's been given, from breath to sun and infinitely more - all appear without my asking. The world too is spontaneous, natural, and comes by grace alone. This is gratefulness without the label, just a moment found aware. 

and it all happens on it's own.

to be aware, is to find myself grateful - everything is appearing truly as a gift, nothing invoked to be here, just arising, seamless from one experience to the next. That I somehow belong to this flow of events, an occurrence of my own singular importance, is a note of joy and wonder. Remembering this, writing this now, and I find that I'm never not grateful for each moment. It's always present, an intimate sense of being alive, belonging, of being grateful for it all. 

~

Peace, Eric 

No Weight

No weight:

unattached to my attachment to an outcome - that I want, and more so, desire a certain way to be, and yet there is no weight to these demands. I am not free of anything that appears to me, from impatience to anger, and every emotion found between. I am host to varied opinions of the world. But no longer am I weighed down by the heft of my own baggage. In a sense, I am free of my own self consideration, that there is a way for me to be that fits a particular definition, even one I fabricated completely on my own. 

it's the freedom to simply be myself.

this is a continual acceptance, of my myself, each moment, and my response to what appears. It's without effort, and not done by any sense of personal design. Life has brought me here, grace, and through this there has come a sense of belonging to it all, no aspect of life foreign to me now. 

everything belongs.

so much is now included, every sorrow of the world to my own personal discomfort, nothing is dismissed as being unworthy to my notice. It's a true compassion, one expressed with my own failings and feelings involved. I am not impartial to any outcome of which I am included - and so this brings attention to what appears within my world. Everything matters, and yet, there is no weight to my concerns. I am free to feel any certain way, for what the moment calls for, even if it's later found misguided - but there's a deeper trust now, that it all belongs, life will continue to flow no matter what I do. I am free of the weight of expectations -

most especially my own. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Parts

Parts:

that I am parts, a gathering of things that seem to hold my sense of self - my body is composed of elements, and each of these too is made of smaller forms.  My world is a collection of ever smaller things, until only space remains. 

yet, where exactly am I found?

no inquiry leads to an answer that can easily be told, everything that is dismissed as not my true self, somehow too belongs. To say that I am any one thing would take me from the whole, to declare myself as only emptiness would miss the essentialness of every part. Where I'm found is in every detail that seems to make me - and I am aware of this. 

so, I am found aware. 

at this point, I don't really need an answer, any inquiry asked is simply for the poetry that follows. I am less interested in philosophy and metaphysics than I am in just writing of the moment. Every question is formulated without an end result in mind. It's the simplicity of asking...and being aware of all that follows. 

writing too is many of parts, words strung to theme, thoughts inspired to ideas. Each detail is essential. Yet where, exactly, is the poetry found? My own answer changes daily, even from moments to the next - at certain times, perhaps, I might find the poetry of an empty page waiting for its fill. Or maybe the arrangement of the words, of how the spaciousness of the page allows their story to be told. In the proper mood my answers would continue to unfold. 

but none of them would be entirely true.

any poetry found, any beauty in the world - is seen through my awareness. It's here, where every part belongs, somehow seamless, whole. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Headless Place of Being

Headless place of being:

it's not to imagine, but to provide evidence for this one assumption - to simply turn attention towards the source that holds awareness, to see for myself this headless place of being. Nothing needs to be imagined, always present, emptiness only waits for my attention. 

my evidence is in seeing, turning to look for my own head is not a Zen metaphor, it's seeing what is, and what isn't in equal measure. Without mirror, or photo, I only have someone else's word for my appearance, never once having seen my own face. 

and it's my true face I'm interested in seeing. 

so I was asked to turn, just trace my attention back from any object, to see who's actually seeing - and of course, there was no one to be found. The source of my awareness - is emptiness. In a literal sense, through my own seeing...

I'm headless.

and more so, through this emptiness, I find myself endlessly fulfilled, that I am the seamless hold for all that comes to my world. It's the capacity for what belongs, and I've yet to discover anything that doesn't, and this so much includes my own sense of self, my body in all it offers, thoughts and personal identity - they are all cherished for appearing. 

everything belongs. 

what see, by seeing, is that I'm not empty of any given thing - but capacity for the world to be, an emptiness of service and true devotion. To find myself headless was a rediscovery of purpose, that by simply being I provide my real value to the world. What a gift to have discovered? That through my absence and appearance, both happening at once in seamless fashion - I am always giving, always serving, and always in the truest sense...

loving what appears.

~

Peace, Eric  

No Other Options

 

No other options:

it's that life allows no other options than what is, and yet this moment alone holds the promise of the future. This isn't about free will, a philosophical subject far beyond my thinking, it's not about what I believe - what is now, what's present, is all the world offers. It will change, already in the midst, and my participation, my seeming choices of involvement will belong to this as well. But what's present now, it's this that calls for my awareness, that even as my world changes, I only have this present moment. Life allows no other options than what is, 

of course the argument otherwise is for the choices to be made, that I affect the world through possibilities and options. I am often told and have long read that there is always an option, another way to view and change my circumstances. Perhaps. But what I touch on here is just what's in the moment, whatever present circumstance is found is the base of every option. 

life is always immediate. 

so, each moment is my only option, it's the reality of now - until it isn't. 

then, there is another moment. 

this isn't about choice, nor free will, but only what is present. My option is what life holds for me, and how it has all come to me is a questioned asked, but so often left unanswered. Mostly, I just don't know. Life is complicated, events entwined, seamless - and here is all is. I accept this, deal, and work with what appears. I participate with life. 

it's my only real option. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Without Deception

Without deception:

with honesty, always - and this is meant without deception of myself, to see clearly and hold each belief so lightly that they vanish without investment of my thoughts. To be honest is to be fearless in letting go, surrendering ideas that no longer serve, and a refusal to accept an easy theory, or cherished faith, simply for the need to know. 

truthfully, there is so little that I really know - and honesty brings only to my direct experience, a certainty of each moment alone, anything beyond this would be speculation, a theory of the unknown. I deceive myself with beliefs that lead from here, that I am anything other than what's found now, this collection of thoughts, and input from the senses. My experience is simply, and always, life itself. It's enough to have this, and more, it's infinite in the mystery that it offers. 

without deception, I am free to allow this mystery to unfold, not directed by demands, nor a wish for things to seem a certain way. It's an easy allowing of what is, life itself for its beauty and all its sorrow, nothing is now excluded. With this has come grace, a settled energy of accepting each event, as well as my reaction, as they appear. Equanimity happens completely on its own, my initial response becomes balanced through the whole. 

my honesty is without effort.

this is all how life happens, an original innocence before my thoughts are added. To be honest is to return to my own innocence, just to note my belonging to the moment and nothing more. It's about not deceiving myself with opinion even as they form, to not become invested through my own cherished form of thinking. If I'm honest with myself - every theory is let go for the reality of this moment. It's not something that I do, but only what I am. 

~

Peace, Eric 

No Conspiracy

No conspiracy:

no one is privy to a truth that is denied others, all insight, while unique, is inclusive to the world, available, and given freely. There is no conspiracy in truth, reality being the fabric of every moment, revealing itself to our senses. We touch what's true with intimacy, air passed against the lips, our breath always a whisper of the reality of right now. 

this, 

and it's just what is, there's no need to wish for a deeper experience than now - this, this moment, includes all aspects of reality, everything entwined, infinite, and known without any need to be told. Real truth is silent, loosely translated to poetic form. 

it's experienced.

there is no great conspiracy, we are not pawns played in any game, cosmic or otherwise. We just refuse to face this moment, the reality of mundane in all its intricate beauty. Our existence alone is worthy of a lifetime, to be explored in all it comes to offer. Right now, for me, this moment holds a rush of words, each inspired to reach the page. There is sunlight and coffee, bird songs outside the window. There are dust motes dancing through a light beam, infinite worlds of their own. This moment is revealed, reality layered in regard to my attention. I know only what I know - and it's enough, more so, it's all that's really needed. Anything added would be fiction, a conspiracy of my own thinking. 

truth, is only, every moment.

~

Peace, Eric 

The Exactness of How Things Are

The exactness of how things are:

it's the perfection of each moment - and by this I mean the exactness of how things are, my world having lead to all that is right now, and that nothing could be other than what's found. This is the realization of what is, without wish for change, but faith that all is motion. 

by this perfection, it's meant beyond my personal needs, not aligned to meet my demands, or even comfort - but that things won't, can't, be any other way for now. Life has lead to this moment, and to each that follows, all in infinite fashion. My every choice has played to this perfection.

so with this comes acceptance.

and by no means is this simply resignation - I am continuously involved, a participant of all circumstances, belonging to this exactness even as it comes to change. My acceptance is full of promise, that this moment brings me one more breath, another rhythm to my heartbeat, and that it all adds to the perfection of the moment that's sure to follow. 

it's about gratefulness.

to accept this, the exactness of how things are, is to be grateful that life is at all, that I am given the means to be expressive, aware, and able to voice my thanks for being here. None of this had to be, and yet now, none of this could be any other way. I have this moment, so full of life, connected to everything, to every aspect of existence, to each of you. 

it is, indeed, the perfect moment. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Content With Mystery

Content with mystery:

to not concern myself with philosophy, that things are or they're not a certainty, is past my point of understanding. I am content with mystery, poetry, and a fluid truth that's told within each moment. To hold my beliefs so lightly, unafraid to let them go. 

with this I find myself relaxed with simply being, no need to rush in defense of a treasured line of thought, no beliefs to argue even to myself. Truth seems to be revealed wordlessly, translated to a particular understanding. I have no wish to debate another's revelation, to bend their truth to mine. We will meet in the silence of our shared perception, seeing together, before the need of a single word arises. 

both content with mystery.

what I write isn't meant to be true, it conveys no reality other than a moment glimpsed with certain insight, perhaps only relevant to myself alone. It's shared through the urge of every word that's given - to be expressed in an artful manner, presented in a unique way through the person who received them. What I write is mystery, and even as they reach the page any truth found as words is already gone. 

what I write is a memory.

and why argue what's remembered, it's faulty ghost at best - I am not concerned with the philosophy of things, each experience is exact they way it is, and there will be a thousand ways for its description. I only offer one, and have no investment in a truth that's now past. What I write is of a moment, and my words always lag an instant just behind. 

it seems any truth remains unwritten. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Where I'm Surrendered

Where I'm surrendered:

to the point where I'm surrendered - and this is not my letting go, but life itself through every moment, that I am always current to what's now presented. The past has no true hold on me, not in any sense that isn't remembered, a story recalled from a life that's passed. It's not that I only reside within the present moment, I'm not a Zen master after all, it's just that this moment is all there is, and there is no choice but to be present in all it offers. 

so life takes me to the point where I'm surrendered, some seamless edge where it's all let go and something new arises. It's continuous, and only memories and beliefs keep me occupied with who I used to be. My truth is always in the present moment. 

my truth is always change.

nothing seeks surrender, all real change is without effort, being just the way that life unfolds, mysterious and with a grace that's simply given. No seed seeks to flower, there's only the trust of nature to unfold in certain ways to allow this change to be. Every aspect of the seed is surrendered to a current asking, that now is the time to soften to a water's touch, to then part in a reach to anchor to the ground. It's a constant letting go, and yet at once a new becoming. 

only the identity of a seed is ever lost.

eventually a flowers time has come, and even this is brief in bloom - there is a point where petals too are surrendered to air, carried back to earth as a start to something new. It's all a continuation of some sort, life always letting go in order to become. Of course I'll mourn my own time of briefly blooming, even as I'm given back to air and earth, and become something beyond my understanding. But nature doesn't cling, it's always current in the true sense of moving on. 

it's to this point where I'm surrendered.

~

Peace, Eric 

Seamless as The World

Seamless as the world:

it's the entire body seamless as the world, a whole organism in benefit to life and its continuation. There is no true place where we leave off and it all begins - we are air given form, and earth somehow made aware. It's one thing, seamless, even in distinctions. This is the view of reality, seen by mystics and physicist, seen everyday in ordinary wonder by us all, yet taken much for granted. It's simply seeing what's laid out in plain view, that the world spreads from our awareness, in every direction turned, and at no point do we find ourselves excluded. 

we are seamless as the world.

things seem to become something other, appearances changing through deception of the senses. But these are just distinctions, a flower doesn't become separate from the bud, the caterpillar isn't other than its metamorphosis to butterfly. Nature is the illusion of change, certainly a shift of appearance and circumstance, yet always in essence just the same. 

what we are is the one essence of the world.

of course this is argued, and nothing here is presented as anything other than how I feel within this moment. It's my own poetry, my seen and felt experience of right now. It's how I see the world and this view holds each of you as well. I can only write of our together. 

so I do. 

Peace, Eric 

Without My Interference

Without my interference: 

my practice is the breath, not to note its passage, but to simply allow the innate intelligence of life to be expressed without my interference. There is no need for mindful participation, although I often draw a breath in deep appreciation, released as a thankful sigh of air. The true practice is to just be alive, to err and see how life responds in wonder. This moment, right now, is where every path leads to, and a lifetime of breaths, of heartbeats in repeated rhythm, a body acting through a wisdom of it's own - has brought me here with certainty. 

yes, I meditate, I give time to what might be considered spiritual acts, moments given to inquiry and simply silence. Yet done of this is practiced with a hope to deliver me to a lofty position of enlightenment, it just seems how my life has come to be expressed. It's no different than breathing really, life has urged me in this direction in a gentle, repeated fashion. I find myself living with an intent truly not my own, perhaps more a whispered grace that guides me. 

yet it's all without my interference.

of course I've tried to interfere, claiming every success as my mine, and what seemed failure blamed to the circumstances of life. I believed that life was my own, that I was a bold leader commanding an unfamiliar world. And of course I was mistaken. There was, there is, really no way to interfere - life happens with my full participation through every function, each breath, and everything is included as a working, organic unit of the whole. It's complete. I'm complete. 

so are you. 

my practice is life, however it unfolds, and what it brings simply what I deal with each moment. Nothing special, no spiritual wish for things to be other. Just life. And if I find myself in full lotus, incense burning, and a chant to bring healing - it's no different than the breath. 

it's how my life is now expressed. 

~

Peace, Eric 

About Presence

About presence: 

it becomes about presence, the only true gift to offer to another - to give of myself, aware, and sure of our connection. This is how I hold the world, an embrace that's empty of goal and agenda, simply allowing life to unfold in the way of its own effect. As if presence could interfere at all, that my will is separate from what unfolds. 

there's only presence.

the distinction, subtle, is the life built through my beliefs of being other, that I talk of presence as if it belonged to myself alone and something I could give to others. Yet even in its intimacy, presence isn't personal, it's not mine, but it includes all I hold in conviction as my own. Presence is my true life, and it allows my personal sense of self to be, to carry on its task of living in such a hurried world. But presence itself remains untouched through it all. 

when we offer something of real value to another, listening, a deep listening that allows someone to be truly heard - there's only presence, just the listening itself, and all but what's being shared recede to the background of the moment. This is how we see each other as well, recognizing ourselves as presence in the guise of someone other. Everything between us is shared, at least the real things, all of us belong as life, presence, living this connection. 

every spiritual practice is simply to remember this, to comeback to what I really am, and all of it serves to a certain surrender - eventually, as always, it's just about presence. There is no practice needed. There's nothing to remember. It now comes to living, an easy sense of being alive without pressure to perform. 

to simply be. 

~

Peace, Eric