I'm Starting To

I'm starting to:

this year has had a high focus on establishing trust, allowing a higher guidance to lead me through life in a more complete way than ever before. It's not really something that can be measured, and definitely not judged in its success. Trusting is something that unfolds naturally over a time, revealed as well as developed through continuous choices made. 

and sometimes it arrives by grace.

a Holy Instant.

my own example is the complete and instant faith I gave to my sobriety almost thirty years ago. It was unearned and definitely felt undeserving at the time. Back then I didn't quite have the langue to frame it, A Course in Miracles was still fairly new to me and my practice rather laxed. Yet without a doubt sobriety came to me as the highest act of trust, being asked for just a little willingness to see my life another way - nothing forced, still an option to say no....

and I was willing.

my tolerance for pain finally reaching its capacity.

over a decade of self destruction ended.

just like that.

of course what followed was commitment, practice, my entire life given to this higher guidance. And there was so much forgetting along the way, mistrust, and just plain stubbornness. That moment of complete trust and the gift of sobriety was a high watermark that hasn't often been reached since.I know this grace is always present though, displayed in infinitely smaller ways. 

I'm trusting.

I just don't always see it...but I'm starting to now.

finally.

~

I love you, Eric

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: My Return Point

Also, please visit to buy: Of Course in Miracles

Thank you.