Discomfort

Discomfort: 

it's very often my least favorite pose that garners my attention and commitment, perhaps with an innate awareness that through this discomfort there is something valuable for me to experience. Sometimes the very asana that holds the most challenge soon becomes a favorite of mine. This isn't limited to a physical challenge, in fact, I'd much rather push through the limits of my body then deal with some of the emotional blocks that can keep me from experiencing a sense of comfort within a pose - with child's pose being one of the most recent examples. Of course these aren't two separate issues, it's the body, as I'm holding a certain posture, that triggers an emotional response,

and it's through the same asana that allows for me to heal. 

utkatasana, chair pose, is an asana that offers both a physical challenge as well as working through some deep emotions that have surfaced as I hold this posture. It's important to me here to not rush the breath, a careful mindfulness that allows my breathing to settle on it's own, relaxing into the posture with a sure and steady commit to explore what ever the moment now offers - even if it's physical discomfort, a rising sense of fear, or as most often in utkatasana, both confronting me at once for the length of five to ten breaths as I hold the pose. 

I should mention that this isn't the physical pain of injury, no, it's the discomfort of a physical challenge that takes me to the edge of what the body wishes to perform and holding that point for just a bit longer than Id like to. It's here that I surrender, and it's also the exact moment that those fearful emotions sharpen and urge me to abandon the pose early. This is the place for me to explore, using breath as a vehicle of surrender, simply relaxing through the waves of anxiety as often as I'm able. 

sometimes it's only for a single breath. 

most often 

more. 

allowing breath and body dictate how long I hold the pose 

at whatever point of my surrender,

and then ease back into a more relaxing posture.

just a moment of discomfort...

utkatasana.

and then on to the rest of my practice. 

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: As Well As My Surrender

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Briefly, a Tree

Briefly, a tree: 

perhaps the asana that calls for my most complete surrender, vrksasana, tree pose, literally pulls me skyward and roots me solid to the earth at the very same time, creating a true moment of poise that allows for me to give myself so fully to the pose. There are other postures that come close to this, mostly in my standing series, poses that require quite a bit of balance and concentration. It's though that combination of effort and relaxing, dynamic, that a unique magic arises, again I can only liken it to a pure moment of poise, recognizing it only after it's achievement. 

but the truth is...I didn't really achieve anything at all.

it happened though my letting go.

being a yoga of my complete surrender. 

it's the solid connection to earth, rooted, and the feeling that I'm truly branching through the air that vrksasana offers that brings me to this joy, there's less strength involved, and more of a search for the sweet spot where everything comes together and this tree energy is revealed and urges me to let go, trusting earth and sky for the flourish of my branching. 

it's a beautiful experience, a shamanic transformation, and not one that I can make happen. It occurs only when the energy is certain, everything locked in place, yet remaining fluid just the same. Really, I'm a participant here, a conduit between the solidness of earth and the ethereal quality of air, being perfect in my position, disappearing completely in the pose.

and then the magic happens.

briefly, 

if only in the moment of my surrender. 

a tree.

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: What am I Grateful For? 

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Thank you. 

Grace and Poise

Grace and poise: 

maybe it's the warmer weather, spring finally taking hold and my body now responding to its warmth and shifting from a winter's length of back pain. Or it could be my perseverance paying off, that I worked through this injury with carefulness and patience, being mindful of even the slightest twinge and making instant adjustments to ease my way into each pose. In either case, I am not yet healed, but feel that I am well on my way to at least a less painful practice. 

and so with this, I'm reintroducing some postures that I've been unable to perform for the length of this injury. Or I should clarify that I can them now without pain involved or any linger discomfort that used to last for several days. Oddly, it was bringing these postures back into the fold that finally allowed me to turn the corner on my pain. This was a big deal for me mentally, as well as energetically, as I was missing what these asanas offered, feeling that my practice suffered from their absence.

even if that was only in my mind. 

it's really all connected.

as my body instantly responded. 

one of these asanas is standing bow, Dandayamana Dhanurasana, a beautiful lengthening pose that stretches through the spine and opens up the chest and shoulders. It's long been a favorite of mind, lending itself to a sense of grace and equanimity that symbolizes yoga for me. I'm happy for its return yet approach with great care and caution, unwilling to sacrifice my long recovery for even a moment's grace within this pose. This is easy to forget though, as the standing bow has always called for my surrender, urging me to commit myself to the possibility of falling forward from the pose as I stretch the entire length of my body. It's a tempting bit of poise, a moment of grace and balance for the price of a backache tomorrow. I've made this trade before, and probably will again. 

yet for now,

 just this small taste of grace and poise is enough to suit me.

it bring me back for tomorrow morning.

and again the day after.

sometimes a taste is all that's needed.

~

Peace, Eric 

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: This Shade of Green 

Also, please visit to buy: The Luminous Self 

Thank you, Eric 

Intuitive Sense of Flow

Intuitive sense of flow: 

lately my asana sessions have taken on a more flowing quality, having a lightness and ease that seems to have arrived completely on its own. My original practice was self taught from a book when I was fairly young and later supplemented by attending yoga classes, mostly based on the Sivananda style of holding postures for specific periods of time with relaxation poses interspersed throughout. As well there was a long streak of Bikram yoga, again with the asanas held for a certain length and allowing the heat to cleanse the mind and body. 

and I thoroughly enjoyed it all.

every means of practice.

mostly though, I enjoy my solo time of yoga, first thing in early morning and having the asanas open up my body, feeling expansive, awakening. I've based these sessions on all I've learned through the years, recent teacher training, and an intuitive sense of flow. I'm learning to listen to my body more now, but even deeper, there's an energy present that's really leading the way though my practice. This is prana, the energetic foundation of life, and it's my true instructor, calling for my surrender and for me to abandon any sense of being in control. This yoga is being expressed through me, my body an instrument of its bidding. thoughts becoming calm and then falling still completely.

it's a beautiful practice. 

as if a grace has been gifted.

unearned.

but I give myself fully to this intuitive sense of flow...

and simply continue with my practice.

~

Peace, Eric

To read more from Headless Now, please visit: April 

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Thank you.