Seven Thousand Trillion Trillion

Seven thousand trillion trillion: 

there's approximately 7x10^27 atoms right now lending themselves to the appearance of our bodies, that's seven thousand trillion trillion atoms. That's a lot. About one-ten thousandths of a second after the Big Bang the earliest particles appeared in the newly created universe, protons and neutrons formed and then soon stuck together to construct atomic nuclei, our earliest of elements hydrogen and helium. After hundreds of thousands of years electrons found their way to bond to this nuclei and the first complete atoms came to exist. That's our origin story, literally the creation of time and expanse of space tells us who truly we are, or at least the seven thousand trillion upon trillion atoms that right now express themselves as our appearance. 

 imagine all the things that those atoms must have been before we the scene, from first stars to the primordial mix of earliest earth and then single celled life, we are constructed from the very same material as pre-historic creatures that once roamed the land, our atoms were once part of ancient forests, wild seas, and eventually those ancestors of first human life. We've been everything and after this brief appearance now we'll continue on as something other once again. 

and even more amazing, consider the possibilities of what those atoms could have been, that our existence wasn't guaranteed to be exactly as it is, of seven thousand trillion trillion atoms we could have been anything at all - and yet here we are. 

gifted from the Big Bang. 

it seems to me that the universe has always been evolving, that it wasn't just early life that grew in complexity and self-awareness, but that the universe itself has sought ways of emerging as new expressions, constantly arranging primordial matter in creative displays of its potential. Perhaps the Big Bang was simply another canvas in an endless show of curiosity and wonder. Our seven thousand trillion, trillion atoms are only a fraction of this order, barely a sand grain along an infinite beach of creation - our bodies being a temporary arrangement of possibilities, a brief appearance before we continue on as another unique expression of existence. So we are actually more than a collection of seven thousand trillion trillion atoms, much more...

we are the universe itself,

through every possible display. 

~

Peace, Eric 

It's All Life

It's all life: 

that it's all life, every aspect from origin of particles to atoms, molecules to cells, the universe teems with this potential. In this way there is no real reductionism, it's far to interdependent for one thing to exist alone and be called essential. This is the essence of the Buddhist Heart Sutra, not that form is reduced to emptiness, but that it's actually one and the same, simply the energy of life in ever changing play, and this is the basis of all existence. 

it's all life, everything, if only in degrees of realization. 

but does this mean that everything has the same value? 

is a pebble equal in its worth to that of a bird? 

the mystery here is of display, how the same ingredients that construct a pebble can somehow too be arranged to form a bird, or any other more active degree of life - and perhaps the Buddha might answer that it isn't a mater of difference between the two, nor that they are the same in anyway, only that existence has somehow come to display a pebble with the same essential ingredients that grants a bird its flight. It's all life in various degrees of potentiality, of energy, vibrations. So there is no real question of worth, everything belongs to the same community of existence, differing only in display if their potential. 

of course that's not really the Buddha's answer, just my own given in poetic license, not even very scientific truthfully. This is just my own insight here, moments after my early morning meditation, sipping coffee and watching first rays of light softly illuminate the world. There are pebbles on my window sill, and right outside I see birds feasting on the seeds left out for them. More so, I see life, seamless, and yet different in display. None of this leaves me with any questions, I'm content with mystery, how everything is so easily given to my view, gifted, and that I'm somehow too part of inclusive nature, another display of the same ingredients of life. 

different. 

but not separate in anyway. 

that it's all life, 

and everything belongs. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Creative Source

there are times I fear that my creative source has been exhausted, a morning without new ideas to write of, and it all feels slightly dry in my attempt to put even a few words together and commit them to the page, Fortunately these moments are few and I mostly write free of any concerns for the sake of my creativity. Usually, writing just seems to flow and ideas arrive completely on their own, no search on my part for any inspiration - I'm tapped in fully to the source. 

of course there's never any true separation, there's no creative source that resides anywhere but exactly where I am now. Everything about me is creative, fiction really, a story that reality tells through the work of particles, atoms, molecules and cells. Mostly I am the emptiness found between these infinitely small items, a construction of convenience in order to know myself as form. This is the very same creative source that has made the world in it's perfect order, everything balanced so easily, almost delicate in how it all seems to fit together in appearance. I am part of this perfect order, belonging here, an aspect of life that's endlessly repurposed for the benefit of the whole, consisting of elements that once exploded in a creative burst from a dying star, elements born from the exact moment that space and time came into existence. 

the truth is...there is only the creative source.

and I am that.

so are you. 

so creativity itself can never be exhausted, it's just a misplaced fear on my part, and there doesn't even need to be a solution. Words always find me, a theme appears, inspiration arrives most every morning eager to be expressed through my own unique style - and on those rare occasions that I find myself waiting for a words appearance, unsure of my connection the creative source, it's only a matter of waiting, reminding myself that this too is the process of creation. 

silence is where words are formed.

and I'm residing at the source.

~

Peace, Eric 

Single Point

Single point: 

 a single point, and from this an entire universe appeared, or at least that's the popular thought associated with the Big Bang - that a singularity, infinitely dense and full of energy, was just ready to expand in vast potentiality, an explosion of both time and space happening from this single point. Yet this description is somewhat misleading, really, it's only a story told in scientific terms and even cosmologist are now telling it a different way. Stories always change as more evidence is gathered, that's why science is an art, unafraid to express itself in new and challenging ways, offering different means to view the world that have never existed before. A theory is simply the process of a never ending work of art. 

without the language of description....

a universe. 

this isn't meant to dismiss the language of the Big Bang, not to argue the single point of energy and how it spread to bring the universe into existence. I'm not a scientist, even writing just the little that I have has nearly exhausted my knowledge on the subject. Whatever I write is only my own expression given, lyrical prose within a scientific view, it's only another story told. But I am an intricate part of this story, intimate really, a key figure. We all are, each of us traced back by the elements of first creation, our origin is that single point of energy and potentiality and whatever could have possibly come before. That grants us each the right of wonder and curiosity, gifts given to us by our inclusion in this universal expression. We're part of this tapestry, individual points within the greater whole, expanding too with energy and wonder. The universe is our story. 

what amazes me is that language can somehow and sometimes limit us in wonder - to use terms such as expansion of space and time, singularity of energy, and even the Big Bang gives our story context, but takes away a certain sense of mystery. Once, there was no universe, nothing, no space, not even a concept of time, or perhaps they existed as formless bits of information, possibilities with the potential to appear - and then the universe happened all at once, not in any great expansion because no space existed yet, no time to offer any point of measure. 

the universe simply happened. 

and there it is, my story too...

once, nothing, or perhaps I existed as some formless bit of inspiration, maybe a promise and possibility of existence, and then suddenly, an entire universe appeared, somehow I simply happened. A single point...and from here my entire story has evolved. 

~

Peace, Eric 

This Is Grace

This is grace: 

that I am at all is pretty astonishing, life simply arrived for me,  from absolutely nothing before - and then I'm here, awake, thriving, and conscious that it's so. This is grace, that it's all unasked for, gifted to me, and in such a way that shows me that I'm deeply cared for. Everything was set up perfectly for my arrival, an entire universe of support and arranged for my convenience. My very first breath was drawn from an abundance of air, a sky full, just waiting for that initial inhalation. There is a sun set in the exact distance for my warmth and comfort, offering light for trees baring fruit, crops nourished by its rays, a life-force given freely to the world. 

and this is just the obvious.

the universe itself had to be arranged perfectly so for my creation, stars eons in their own making, and then exploding in order for the proper elements to exist. This is my origin story, owing my existence to the grace of stars. My very foundation is made from those basic elements of exploding stars, with the exclusion of two that were created through the actions of the Big Bang, so the initial birth of space and time were the first points of my creation. 

this is grace, everything, that it's all provided, a universe arranged for my existence.

some scientist believe in random chance, insisting on the accidental nature of it all - and perhaps it's so, I know better than to argue with great minds, and honestly, have little interest in doing so. For me, this is grace, unasked for, given to me from a stars existence, an entire universe arranged for me to be here. None of it seems random, there's too much love here. it's too personal. 

this is where I belong, this moment, now, here.

this is grace. 

~

Peace, Eric 

True Spirituality

True spirituality: 

that it's all spirit, or perhaps some would prefer to call it energy, maybe consciousness, or even God, our name for this existence doesn't really matter - it's all cooperation, attraction, points of individuality working for the seamless function of the whole. True spirituality is simply the recognition of this, living our lives as if every aspect of life mattered in a deep and meaningful way, that everything is sacred in some deep and meaningful way. This, of course, is different than religion, there's no theology here, nothing is worshiped as a separate source from life itself. 

our lives, here, now, is what's found holy. 

that's true spirituality, or my definition at least, and it's all inclusive, no dividing lines of what appears to be only my concern, everything serves in someway, even if it's beyond my current understanding. I trust that life has its own sure wisdom, that it's built into the deep fabric of its very nature, an intelligence that is curious and evolving, self-aware. My proof is my own existence, being made of the same stuff as found throughout the cosmos, gases and elements constructed by atoms, and that atoms themselves vibrate towards each other by some intentional attraction, an urge to be something larger than they are alone, the truest act of their unconditional service and love.  

honestly, we don't have to call this anything at all, it's not true spirituality, not really, it's just how life happens, science described in some a romantic sense. But we're storytellers by our very nature, creating languages to describe the world and communicate our sense of beauty and awe to each other. Science is a story told through investigation, experiments repeated, observation. The story of true spirituality is similar in a way, based upon a deep contemplation of our inner world and its seamless contact to what appears to be the entire cosmos of our existence. It's no less real than the story science tells, only more personal, intimate, placing ourselves firmly in the story. 

true spirituality is our self-description.

it's our story told from that single act of a particles vibration...all the way to the construction of our world, and further still - 

the cosmos as the soul of our existence. 

or at least that's how this story goes. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Reoccurring Themes

there seems to be some reoccurring themes here, my writing taking me down familiar avenues of thought and ideas that are seen somewhat different now, asking for a new expression to be given to the page. I enjoy this, so many different ways to write of the values that shape my life, the gifts that light my spirit with the fire that they show. Writing itself is one of these reoccurring themes, my early morning ritual of meditation, coffee, and commitment to words. I write of this often, never tiring of how these simple, quiet moment can so easily be told, there's a tenderness here, almost fragile in the balance of silence and words, everything in a perfect place of listening, receiving....

writing. 

perhaps this isn't really a reoccurring theme, none of it is, it's all freshly told to me each moment, and only later does it seem familiar, that I've written of this topic so often before. Yet each time is different, completely so, as there's nothing that is the same for me, each of my moments transient by nature, and what seems to be a reoccurring theme is simply a new appearance of something holy, sacred to me alone, and with an urge to be written down, expressed uniquely in this fragile moment. 

perhaps.

but it doesn't really matter, writing seems independent of any of my wishes and demands, and honestly I prefer it this way, without any pressure to produce ideas of my own. All I really do is show up each morning, just moments from my meditation, coffee at hand, my one and only cup that complete the ritual of my writing. I am hear to listen, enjoying the warmth of coffee sips, the quietness that exist only before dawn, and there's really no need for words. What I have right now is enough, more so, I'm profoundly grateful for these moments, relaxed, and with this...

writing seems to happen, words appear, my listening more active now, expectant, and today there's a reoccurring theme that wishes to be written.

it's simply what the moment holds. 

~

Peace, Eric