Soft Awakening

Soft awakening: 

think of it as a soft awakening, gentle, continuous in a way - there's no ultimate knowledge gained, no sense of self permanently erased. What's seen is that everything comes and goes through an allowing field of awareness, and there's no need to make this into any grand claim of enlightenment. It's just the way things are, the way they've always been, and we've only failed to notice. 

this soft awakening...and life continues on.

of course there's other ways too, different and deeper insights, and some will argue that their's is the only way for reality to be displayed, that enlightenment has been reached and their most meaningful questions have been completely answered. Who's to say otherwise? Honestly, if anyone finds a lasting sense of joy and true contentment than I'm happy for them and find no reason to argue against their view. What others gain or lose in a spiritual sense is not my concern at all. For me, life flows on through this soft awakening, a continuous wonder, always a mystery, and I'm simply inspired to write and share how life appears to me right now. 

I claim only this soft awakening...

nothing more.

it's enough for me. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Of Being

Of being: 

so I'm struck once again with how easy life is for me, of course not the often complicated acts of my daily affairs, but the ease in simply existing, of being an aspect of life that spontaneously appears from the force of particles gathering as atoms and continues on in supply of an entire world for me to live. There wasn't a single thing for me to do here, no effort given, not even a thought for my appearance to form. 

it all just happened on its own. 

a true miracle of being. 

remembering this seems to put me immediately at ease, that the true fundamentals are ultimately cared for by a deeper wisdom, that my body responds to some inner command of breath and heartbeat, blood flowing exactly where it's needed, and that even the environment supports me with an abundance of air and the proper distance form the sun for plants to grow and provide my daily need of food. I am truly cared for, supported with all I need to thrive as an aspect of life itself. 

and I try and take none of this for granted, I am grateful to my core, and do my best to show this in some way - offering a thankful prayer for the breakfast I prepare, appreciating the ease of which my body performs a difficult yoga posture, noting the breath arriving through the grace of air. None of this is taken for granted, not the simple things, nor the difficulties too, actions that take more effort or fill me with concern. I am grateful to exist, to be aware that this is so, and that all of life, every aspect, has been gifted to me somehow. 

yes, a true miracle of being. 

life itself, happening completely on its own. 

a gift. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Deepest Joy Of Green

Deepest joy of green: 

springtime, and every year it seems like such a long wait for it to reach me - it's April, and warmer days are finally here, longer, and I bask in the extra light that's given, spending more time on my walks and runs, grateful to lose the layers of clothing that served me through the winter and that I'm now able to give myself more fully to the sun. I truly love this time of year, being right on the cusp of the world literally exploding in its deepest joy of green, and with the splash of flowers arrayed brightly throughout the verdant landscape. 

 earth shows me it's alive.

winter's been more difficult these past few years, harder for me to gain any lasting warmth and harder still to experience any joy. Spring has become even more significant to me now, bringing a meaningful warmth that reaches past bones and into soul, my interior landscape awakening in its own deepest joy of green, a verdant display that matches what the season brings. 

springtime shows me I'm alive. 

and so every day I note the hue of earliest buds and first leaf reaching for that extra sunlight. I am displayed by their colors, expressed through a flower's blossom, my soul warmed by spring's breeze even as it still holds a bit of winter in its touch. I've emerged through a cold depth that seemed to hold so very little color, it's springtime now, sunlight having extra hours...

and the earth shares its deepest joy of green.

~

Peace, Eric 

To Practice Gratitude

To practice gratitude: 

there are different ways for us to practice gratitude, a mindful approach, or keeping a journal to list the many things we have that often slip our mind as being gifts. Anything that reminds us that life is rich in giving and that we are so fortunate to receive its many blessing is a worthwhile endeavor. A practice is simply a cultivation of thoughts, habits, that serve us in some useful, practical way - and being grateful, mindfully so, has benefits far beyond its measure. The practice itself is far reaching in what it offers us, from it's immediate effect of a smile for what's present, to pain relief, increasing health and lifespan, easing depression, and actually altering the brain in a way that improves the quality of our thinking. It's amazing to consider that just by being aware of all that we've been given, and then life showers us with even more in a subtle, yet meaningful fashion.

yes, there are different ways to practice gratitude, all being worthy of our consideration, but my favorite is when it just spontaneously arrives, unbidden, and fills me with an inner smile that seems to reach directly from my soul and overflows to touch the world. It's unexpected, yet no longer rare, as it occurs now throughout my day, odd moments of such deep appreciation that I'm forced to pause and give note to its arrival. I find that I'm grateful for its appearance, a gift of appreciating what's present and how it found its way into my life, being thankful for the ability to give thanks and basking in the glow of simply being happy. It's not so much a practice any longer as it an event, just noticing it as it happens, and being touched by this small, important joy. 

to practice gratitude takes no real effort at all - notice the breath, freely given, and the abundance of air readily pressed against our lips, eager, and the ease in which it's drawn. There it is, our practice, one long breath lovingly considered...

and the countless ones that have come before.

yet this one,presently taken,

being grateful to receive. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Where I Address the Hard Problem

Where I address the hard problem: 

this is where I address the hard problem of consciousness - my own thought is that there isn't any cause for separation here, that the question itself is misplaced in even asking of its source. Whatever answer is given stands correct in a certain way as everything is the source of consciousness, being sure that it's a biological function, caused by a chemical reactions within the brain, as well as a builtin function of universal intent and design. It's all consciousness, an arrangement of infinite points, seamless in their actions, and that we emerge, somehow, from this creative field of possibilities. 

that every theory of consciousness is correct in its own way. 

even mine. 

and of course I'm certainly wrong, with no way of really knowing how things ultimately are - all I can offer is a description of my own observation brought through countless mornings of deep meditation. Yet that doesn't make it true, and I'm in no way invested in it being so. But it does give me something to write of, an opportunity to be creative with ideas and inspirations. This is where I address the hard problem of consciousness through my own words and understanding, and my view is as valid as any ever offered before, and honestly, it doesn't seem to be a problem much as all...

consciousness is. 

and everything is cause for its emergence.

to even ask why is a task of endless inquiry - the answer is always because of happy accident as well as being evolution, that it's exactly how the universe was designed and we are simply part of its necessary function. Through inquiry we regress to mystery, every point being valid and yet not an ultimate cause at all, proof of our own innocence of answers and free of speculation. Here, life, consciousness...is simply happening, with no reason save its own appearance. 

it's exactly how things are. 

and of course I'm certainly wrong.

but this morning, here, invited by an empty page...this is where I address the hard problem of consciousness.

unconcerned with being right or wrong.

just happily inspired. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Oddly Funny

Oddly funny: 

what I have now is a sense that not everything needs to be specific to my needs, or even bend towards my comfort and understanding. I am more apt to leave things alone, finding ease with life exactly as it is and not fill the world with my opinion. Of course the irony is that I'm at once more creative and inspired, with words rushing to my fingers eager to be written, and I share them freely through the pages here. It's a paradox in a way, and that's part of what I've come to accept - that life flows in oddly funny ways, mysterious...

and I am simply part of its expression. 

with this I find that I'm more restful, at ease with the way things are even as I might have a wish for some circumstances to change. I have more faith in motion now, knowing that no situation is lasting and that my every moment is fluid, already in the midst of becoming something other. It's oddly funny, clinging to what's present even as it's changing, or refusing to accept that a most cherished gift won't last. That's our sorrow, forgetting that life is constant motion, and that's why even as the world is seen as flowing with grace and a rhythm of purpose...it's tinged by a certain sadness too. 

oddly funny how everything belongs, seemingly a paradox.

But really, just a mystery.

and so I write, every morning, whatever words spontaneously appear, sharing it all as its been given. It's how things are right now, and I'm grateful for how my life unfolds, being oddly funny in so many ways, touched by sadness too, and that everything seems to belong at once, not a true contradiction at all - but simply life, flowing, mysterious, seamless. 

being always motion. 

~

Peace, Eric 

Trails

Trails: 

I've spent a lot of time on trails, racing and training, adding my footsteps to the infinite numbers before mine, and all the while it's been without a true destination. It's an odd thing to consider in a race, especially one of longer distance, that it's traveling on the trail itself that's the victory, being present to wherever we are between the point of start and finish, and that right here, the step we're taking now, is always exactly where we're meant to be. If we think of trails only as a line that marks our journey across a landscape, or that it's simply a racecourse that provides our steps a challenge, we miss out on the most meaningful aspect of all...

trails are our connection to earth, and that each footstep is our only sure destination. Trails aren't a pathway across distance, although that certainly is the appearance, the reality is that we are called to travel them not by footsteps alone but by heart as well, by soul really, with the only true connection being a deep belonging to the earth, each step a reassurance that we're already home, an arrival without start or finish. The trail is it's own destination. 

here' now...known by every footstep. 

and that's the urge of every trail and pathway, not to travel, or at least not primarily so, but to place ourselves in the midst of our own present landscape. Nothing else is asked of us, not to reach a final point, or to see how fast or far our travel, to just be conscious of where we are in the only way we're truly meant to be...

that the trail itself is our connection. 

there is nowhere else but here.

now, always, only, 

now.

~

Peace, Eric