Our First Acknowledgment

Our first acknowledgment: 

and always with an emphasis on healing, forgiveness is first given as acknowledgment to what's present, but with a refusal to make our suffering real, that yes, whatever's occurring has an effect, yet ultimately it's a thought created sorrow that is only healed through love. 

our first acknowledgment is key though.

and then not bypassed, 

but explored through depths of pain, tended to, intimately so...

and only then surrendered.

finally forgiven. 

~

I love you, Eric

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I don't Understand

I don't understand: 

again lesson 25 of A Course in Miracles is my great surrender, admitting to myself, again and again it seems, that I truly don't know what anything is for, and yet I continue to cherish the things that have so little value to me. Of course this is just a lure offered by the ego, still promising me that one more shiny thing of the world will bring me true and lasting peace of mind. 

and I still believe it, even after a lifetime of false promises that only brought me pain. I still grab that shiny lure and allow the ego to drag me in again. But there is a difference now, a gentle smile plays in my heart when I admit that I don't know what anything is for, and then instantly surrender every lure and false promise over to a greater understanding than my own. 

I don't know what anything is for -

and I don't have to.

as purpose for everything will be revealed when I really need to know.

and I finally remember to ask...

to truly understand.

~

I love (and understand) you (You)

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Landmarks

Landmarks: 

I'm only asked to love, with this being my true nature - and anything else that appears in life is simply a landmark that guides my return to this reality. I have become very committed to this return, sincere in my approach to forgiveness in its most holy sense. Yet still I am often lost, perhaps completely off course sometimes...

ah, but those landmarks, 

bless them.

always offering a sure correction, whatever tug of resentment, or the shadow of a grievance, and I am certain that I'm veering far from home. These landmarks show me the way of my return, a flag of warning that a rocky and thorny terrain lies just ahead should I continue down this path. 

and so forgiveness, my internal compass, pointing true...

gently leads me home.

~

I love you, Eric 

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Simply Love

Simply Love: 

such a need to make things special, small cherished relationships set apart and made to seem separate from the all others. I have spent a lifetime in defense of specialness, my own, as well as those chosen to prop up my ego's demand for recognition. I'm retired from that now, or at least I hope so - as there are still the last tired cries of my demands. 

but they're softer now.

quieter. 

and yet...

something more intimate is being offered, something beautiful, holy, and now I see the entirety of the world in a single presence. It's not a small cherished love any longer....it's simply love cherishing everyone through the appearance of another. 

there's only love.

and I finally see that now.

~

I love you.

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Through the Eyes of Love

Through the eyes of love: 

our own salvation lies within others, being found nowhere else, and this is why our only true task is practicing forgiveness. A Course in Miracles reminds us that sin has no place in heaven, and that heaven itself exists within others. This often feels like a monumental challenge, looking past any perceived sin and at the same time facing very real pain. In truth, this is impossible to do, at least by ourselves.

here it is, the answer, the secret key to the door of our salvation...

forgiveness has nothing to do with sin.

it only recognizes innocence.

our own, 

others.

and the presence of innocence is only revealed through the eyes of the Holy Spirit. So we're never asked to see the impossible. Our role is always one of surrender, to see not from our eyes, but through a holier vision that peers directly to the heart of another. We surrender the judging eyes of ego...

and clearly now,

a heart-shared vision.

seeing through the eyes of love.

~

I love you, Eric 

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There's Nothing to Fear

There's nothing to fear: 

there is nothing to fear, lesson 48 of A Course in Miracles assures me of this - and yet I am certainly gripped hard by it right now, illusion or not it's currently a heavy presence in my life. Oddly enough, it's also reassuring as well. Fear is a sign of my misplaced strength, that I believe there's a sense of control here and ego has everything well handled. 

of course that isn't so.

the very presence of fear tells me otherwise.

my only strength is through surrender.

everything to God.

 so fear reminds me to let go.

to trust.

and to whatever extent that I'm able, perhaps even just a little, 

just a little...

I do. 

~

I love you, Eric 

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I'm Only Asked

I'm only asked: 

this is my period of trust, right now, and it brings me right back to the beginning of A Course in Miracles, that nothing real can be threatened, nothing unreal exists. With this...I am finally ready for the peace of God, and only wish to see what's truly valuable to me. 

of course this is a difficult time, long cherished relationships relinquished, some items lost, and uncertainty rules much of my days. It doesn't often feel like theirs reason to trust. Yet all this gives cause to look deeper, to examine all that the ego holds dear. 

I'm only asked to let go of all that's never truly been mine.

and rediscover what is real. 

I'm only asked to love.

my trust begins here.

~

I love you, Eric

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Between Us

Between us: 

and I always want you to know that you're forgiven, not as any sort of act that I've bestowed upon you, but simply as a thought of grace shared between us, a recognition of who you truly are. In this way too I recognize myself, knowing that we share this light,

 together...

and you see me in the very same grace. 

I love you. 

~

Eric 

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Seamless

Seamless: 

I'm offering myself forgiveness, finally, it's as if my every focus towards others have found their way towards me and are now asking to be healed. There is no true forgiveness without my own inclusion. I am vital to the process, and indeed, the salvation of the world depends on my involvement. 

forgiveness is the undoing of our illusions. 

to see myself inseparable from you.  

and that your healing depends upon this seamless vision.

so I forgive myself...

and heal the world. 

~

I love you, Eric

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Whatever Small Grace

Whatever small grace: 

maybe it's enough, whatever small grace we're able to offer, or simply acknowledging someone's presence in our lives - maybe it's enough to just say I don't hate you, or resent you any longer, and I'm letting go of all my grievances towards you. Maybe it's enough to simply say I love you...and then allow silence to follow those magical words. 

maybe it's enough to forgive -

in whatever small grace we're able to offer right now.

maybe we could try.

~

I love you, Eric

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I Don't Know

I don't know: 

truly, and more so than ever, my life has become nothing but a prayer of letting go, noting that I don't understand what anything is for and surrendering any notion that I do. This is a prayer of the obvious, that my ego has made use of that has appeared in my life for the sake of it's own arrangements and this has never once brought me lasting peace of mind. 

I don't know what anything is for.

and that's now my prayer.

I just don't know.

but there is a presence within me that whispers certainty, a holy voice, softly waiting for my acknowledgement. It knows exactly what to do and what everything is for - 

and if I'm willing to listen...

it tells me.

~

I love you, Eric 

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A Love Story

A love story: 

and the question that comes is of healing, asking if we truly wish to heal...or merely continue to defend our various stories of the world that keep us bound to a limited perspective? And of course everything's a story, our own personal labels added to the every aspect of the world, each person we encounter almost instantly given a description that either places them in our favor or a warning to keep distant. This isn't purposeful, it's our default network mode of protection. 

but it's still a story.

invested with all of our belief.

defended brilliantly and sometimes even violently. 

yet only a story.

only love needs no defending, having no actual story other than continuously extending itself without bias nor limit. The more we love - the less we have to defend. As a Course in miracle states: nothing real can be threatened, nothing unreal exist. We are beyond the need to defend anything not real. Our only story, being true and presently unfolding...

is love. 

~

I love you, Eric 

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Entirely on You

Entirely on you: 

no one heals apart from another, indeed, collectively, the world is the promise of my own enlightenment, depending entirely on you, and you, and you...

infinitely so.

this is the shift that miracles ask for, that we may see each other only as individual aspects of a single mind, and not one of us truly exists as separate from another. In this light I seek to heal far beyond my own benefit but for yours as well. Forgiveness is our shared sacrament that draws us to this eventual conclusion. I forgive you literally means that I recognize the holy light shared between us...

and so with this,

we begin to heal the world. 

~

I love you, Eric

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Cared For

 

Cared for: 

it really is an easy path, calling for nothing but my surrender, and even this is already cared for without any direct involvement of my own. This about trusting in the will of God, and as A Course in Miracle states - I need do noting except not interfere, and that's the only real difficulty here, as ego always wishes to arrange and shift everything just so. The ego is simply trying to bring order to illusion and this will never work for very long. 

it isn't meant to. 

at this point in my life though - I'm asked to trust. 

and finally, now, 

I do.

~

I love you, Eric 

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Holy Encounter

Holy encounter: 

we could view our loneliness as a miscommunication, that the falseness of the ego is wishing for a sense of completion from deep within its dream of separation. My own loneliness tells me this is so, as well as my wish to feel whole amongst the broken pieces of an often shattered life. These days the lines of communication feel more open, linked in to an innate wholeness that holds my brokenness with infinite care and such a holy tenderness. 

and yet...

there's still a wish for intimacy through the heart space provided by another...and this too feels divinely inspired right now, gifted really, how the holiness of another could somehow recognize the holiness within me and we would join in an instant understanding of who we truly are - even for just a moment. 

 loneliness is just a call to recognize ourselves. 

and our wish to share this with another. 

it's preparation for a holy encounter.

be ready. 

~

I love you, Eric 

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From Perception to Vision

it's a very subtle shift, and yet a miracle transforms the world we see. What happens here is a move beyond perception, that our projections lessen and true vision is gained - and it entirely depends on the inner teacher we choose. Ego will always perceive a world of sin, guilt, and separation. That's the very reason for it's existence, to create a landscape for it to rule in complete isolation from the truth of God. But the Holy Teacher within, a quiet voice of love, offers us a vision of what lies just beneath the world of our perceptions. 

this is the truly created. 

holy.

waiting only for our shift to vision. 

~

I love you, Eric 

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Opportunities

Opportunities: 

the world is our awakening, full of opportunities to extend ourselves in peace - and forgiveness is vital as our practice. Here, we see that both forgiveness and peace are different than previously imagined. These are qualities we now posses, already at hand, yet blocked from our awareness. Our great opportunities are all the things that point directly to their absence.

and through this...

we forgive our way to peace. 

~

I love you, Eric

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Advanced Degree

Advanced degree: 

there is no special level of forgiveness, and I'm not advanced by any degree beyond you - yet I am sincere in my practice, devoted to a lifetime of letting go of my every grievance and resent. It's with this that I find myself growing deeply in a sense of peace, kinder, and more easily being able to extend love even through my most troubling times. 

but not always. 

sometimes I'm too hurt to immediately offer forgiveness, or too petty to instantly be kind. Not as often as before, in fact, it's seldom now and never for very long. Still it happens, and here, on these occasions, I seek to love myself even more. 

my own healing is the advanced degree.

forgiving myself being hardest of all. 

yet I am sincere in my practice. 

devoted. 

and committed to a life of love. 

~

I love you, Eric

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Found

Found:

when I found myself as love - 

as if suddenly becoming,

exactly,

and always...

what I've always been.

~

more so, life is continuous in this way, as if each forgiveness opportunity breaks me further open to a new depth of soul. There is no end to this awakening, just love, and I'm drawn further into it's unique expression with every moment of my surrender. 

truly now,

only love is real...as only love is found. 

~

I love you, Eric

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Forgiveness Takes Us Home

Forgiveness takes us home: 

so here, ego is defined as a mistaken belief that we have somehow separated from God and have gained an independent navigational system that guides us through the world. An ego limits us to the body and keeps us small in our every ambition.

it's not wrong - 

but simply an illusion.

forgiveness sees right through this, heading past the ego to the still-point within and says that we are committed to  seeing each for who we truly are, and that here - our every wrongdoing is impossible. There is no sin, only belief in a mistaken thought system that has led us astray. 

forgiveness takes us home.

~

I love you, Eric 

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So Simple

So Simple: 

it's so simple these days, being an easy path of forgiveness with everything else let go - just kindness matters to me now. This is the only awakening I need, truly so, as the ego is diminished in it's role, such a smaller voice than ever before, and with little need to cater to its every demand. My life is a gentle approach to my own wounds, a present tenderness...

and it's this I wish to give to others.

it's so simple. 

I do my best to offer only love.

~

I love you, Eric 

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Trust

Trust

and now my life is based on trust, still faulty and unsure at times, yet guided towards a sense of love and safety just the same. This feels like a pivotal place for me, that it's critical to allow my fear it's presence while keeping faith central to my focus. I'm not asked to bypass tears, nor loneliness, but to simply allow, and allow, and allow.

even to the point of breaking.

and with this my trust is finally surrendered...

to a greater strength than mine. 

~

I love you, Eric

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Already Forgiven World

Already forgiven world: 

so the question arrives, and it's always the most extreme example of our sins- how do we forgive what truly seems to be unforgivable? As long as we deal exclusively with form, seeing only bodies in conflict with another, then, indeed, forgiveness is impossible. No one wants to forgive a horrendous crime or act of violence that leaves us shaken to the core. Closer to the heart, our personal wounds often leave us too raw to even consider offering forgiveness to the one who caused the wound. Perhaps greater still is our inability to self-forgive our greatest errors. 

but we need do nothing.

forgiveness is truly divine and belongs exclusively to the Holy Spirit.

our role is only a little willingness,

 open to it's presence. 

and with this we come to see... an already forgiven world. 

~

I love you, Eric

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No Error

No error: 

so the directive is clear, do not see error, and the rest is simply practice. That's the nature of the forgiveness, or at least the radical means as offered by A Course in Miracles. Here, we asked to see no error, to not make it real, and look upon only the face of Christ within another. This isn't to bypass the level of form, it's looking deeper, past the temporariness of our surface concerns to the actuality of who we truly are. 

the Christ within me, 

reality,

clearly sees the face of Christ within you. 

and thus.... 

everything's forgiven/

~

I love you, Eric

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Joyfully

Joyfully: 

there is a deep joy here, independent of circumstance, vital, and becoming more clear and evident to me everyday. Yes, of course there's sadness present too, grief, and a whole host of symptoms brought through living in extremely confusing world. But none of this touches the joy of my essential nature, providing me a soft return for every foray into sadness. 

God's will for me is perfect happiness.

clearly so.

and I rediscover this everyday.

joyfully. 

~

I love you, Eric 

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A Radical Path

A radical path: 

I don't want to live my life for the sake of a concept, an illusion propped and perpetuated by a host of beliefs - and this is why forgiveness holds so much promise for me. What's practiced is a radical path of a forgiving what has never happened, recognizing that, yes, on the level of form there's been transgression, but more deeply so, beyond the mere thought of form...

a holiness prevails. 

and so I practice this radical type of forgiveness in order to experience the actuality of Christ within me, a living presence that's shared between us. 

it's beyond concepts.

without illusions. 

and only love prevails.

~

I love you, Eric 

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A Little Doubt

A little doubt: 

without need of preparation, no cleansing rite performed, we are as ready to receive a miracle as our willingness allows - and it only takes a little. A miracle here is simply a shift of perception, asking of ourselves to be willing see the world a different way, truthful to our  original values, and aligned with who we really are. This is where the Holy Instant comes in, just that brief of keeping aside our false narrative of being small and alone in an uncaring world and allowing ourselves to entertain a little doubt that this is truly so...

only a little doubt, 

and the Holy Spirit rushes in to fill this void. 

it's that simple.

 just be willing to be...what we already are. 

only love is real. 

nothing unreal exist.

and in this Holy Instant instant...we know exactly what we are.

~

I love you, Eric

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Tiny Mad Idea

Tiny mad idea: 

my own tiny mad idea, repeatedly played through the mind as my every belief of being separated from the love of God. This is the continuous cosmology of the ego, how my own little universe expands in limitations and keeps me feeling cut off from source. And that's all it is, an entire thought system being just a tiny mad idea that's somehow gained traction to the point of self-belief. 

and yet,

in the absence of these thoughts of separation...

I am.

and only God is found. 

~

I love you, Eric

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There is No World

There is no world: 

there is no world, workbook lesson 132 clearly states that this is the central premise of A Course in Miracles and that it's a vital thought of us to realize. Many other traditions teach this too, and yet it's the Course that gives me the greatest hope for change. What's ask of me is to accept this only to my limits, there's no need for a giant leap of imagination. Indeed, it's just the opposite, all that's required is the realization that I've imagined this world into existence...and I can just as easily begin to dream a happier world.

I have given this world all the meaning it has for me.

and now,

begins a happier dream.

~

I love you, Eric 

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One Belief

One belief: 

my one belief is God, and yet it's only a term used for description, a conversational tool meant to convey the all pervading reality of love. When asked if I believe in God my reply is perhaps as often no as it is to say yes - it's just an easier answer, truthful too, as my faith isn't founded upon a single concept that can so readily be explained. 

God has been my experience of life.

beyond belief, really.

no is description needed.

and yet,

God is so beautifully expressed through every thought of love. 

with this...

my life displays just one belief. 

~

I love you, Eric 

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This Need Not Be

we notice - and then let go. 

there's no battle here, it's not a struggle between chaos and calm - no, it's much more prayerful, a continuous return to the underlying silence of God. Whenever anxious thoughts gather, or fear offers a sense of gloom, one simple prayer is enough brings us home -

 we say to ourselves...this need not be.

and then listen, 

there's another option here, gentle, quieter, softer,

whispering just past the point of silence.

listen.

this is our direction home. 

~

I love you, Eric

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